having trouble with gf and kids

[Trevor]

You know, that line about "where we are going with this relationship" and wondering if she is "just wasting time" has gotten me, and probably many on this board, into the predicament we are now in...

Dude learn the lesson the easy way. Make sure she knows she is a distand second to the kids. Her pressure cannot be good. Read you own posts!

[Pete]

As I told the law guardian in my case,

I would like to have a social life of my own, but not at the expense of my child's care. My ex would prefer to care for her children, but not at the expense of her own life. She had shown over and over again that her own personal relationships and priorites supercedes those of her kids.

Bottom line, when anything comes before your kids, they will suffer somehow. If the GF cannot understand that, then she needs to go.

[foxct]

Trevor, words to live by, "read your own posts". That's essentially what my counseling has revealed, listen to my own feelings. Much of life has been spent doing things without paying attention to what I wanted. For me, my own voice is the hardest to hear.

[Trevor]

foxct, introspection is a great thing. Trick is, acting upon what you discover. I was doing things for everyone else too, and while giving I received joy; yet I was neglecting myself.

The point is as well, you have a responsibility to the kids, first and foremost. The gf wants, and the kids need. The gf wants to be placed before the kids' needs. This is unsustainable for a man who loves his kids, and anyone worth a long-term relationship will not ask you to do this.

Good luck.