Postby buggabu79 » Sat Feb 19, 2005 5:13 pm
I am writing in this forum, because I know of nothing else that can be done! My brother is a great guy, good Christian values, good worker and has held the same job for nearly 10 years. He is liked by just about everyone, he doesn't drink and is not a party person, just a good guy. He loves his kids!
He married his ex wife and accepted that she had a child from an old relationship and took him as his own. She lied about the circumstances of the old relationship, he trusted her and they were married.
A few years into marriage she gave birth to my brother's biological son and fathered both of them for the years they were married. He found out that she was cheating on him with a married man twice her age that also had a family. She was 25, He was 50. She drug my brother through an aweful custody battle and divorce. By this time she had become pregnant with a child from the 50 year old guy. His wife divorced him, against his will and he moved in with my brothers soon to be ex.
Over the next year or so, an evaluation was done and my brother found to be the more "fit" parent. But, he had no rights to the son that he raised that was not his. In an attempt to father both children he settled for 50% custody of both instead of 100% custody of his biological son only.
She eventually kept taking it back to court forcing more and more, using her grandfathers money and taking all she could get. After going into debt, losing his house, and pretty much being forced into bankrupcy, my brother called me for help in order that I could help with finances and mostly help watch the children while he worked nights so that he could keep 50 % custody. I moved in with him and helped for 2 and a half years. Although, this did help, it wasn't enough, she kept at it and eventually took full custody of the children. The kids were even abused by her lover and it was tolerated because they couldn't use the children's testimonies. I guess they wanted one of them to be severely injured first.
She often took the kids for long periods where my brother is not able to see them. She makes her own rules and the judge does nothing but collect the fees for contempt that my brother has repeatedly filed.
Anyway, now, she is (no surprise) five years married to the 50 year old guy and is getting a divorce. She claims the man is abusive, ( go figure right?) Now she has moved 5 hours away and my brother is heart broken, he has < parenting time > with his son, and now doesn't get to see him, even with the court order. He has not seen the other son who is not his biological son in a couple of years. He is heart broke and has no where left to turn. I fear for him that he is losing hope and is constantly missing his kids.
Is there anything he can do? He is in the state of Oregon and no where to turn, please help, I want to give him hope that he can see his son. He has no history of drug abuse, she does, he is an outstanding citizen with no alcohol use, no records of anything, he is clearly a great parent. He pays his child support and even offered her help with getting the kids beds or other needs while she has left this other guy. She is heartless and relentless in keeping his sons away from him. What can he do?