Am I missing anything, signing this week.

[Anything4Her]

Also STBX has also stated that when it snows she will not pick up D5. She will make STBX mother do it. STBX Mother in law wont do it if snow is bad, yes she told me, which is fine for me since it means D5 stays home with me. Should this be an issue?

I see no reason to mention the word 'snow' in the agreement. If no one picks up D5, then she stays with you, problem solved.


BTW, your stbx is a real POS. It sounds like she is a wild child you tried to tame, and failed.

You are doing great. Get it all nailed down and signed and then get her out of the house. You want as much separation and time to pass as possible before her plans completely implode. All it will take is for Mr. Wonderful to start focusing on some other married chick over the internet.

-A4H

[Pasttimetoleave]

Alright talked to lawyer, it was already phrased that that the child must be picked up and returned to the place of pickup by the visiting parent. Since I have primary and all she gets is < parenting time > problem solved.

He said it will be hard to swing more then 50/50 legal custody in a uncontested divorce since she has no proven mental health issues or drug history.

Also she made food last night and sent me a text telling me she left a plate for me in the fridge, since I was working a rare night shift to cover for another manager. I stopped and got take out on the way home. Man was she mad, and was I ever happy when I woke up to her puking from food posioning at 4am. Only problem is that pushed the signing from today to next Thursday since she can't go now. Maybe she finally learned her cooking sucks.

[chereeda]

She's moving to Japan??? She gets the kid in Japan for a summer visit and refuses to send kiddo home, whatcha gonna do about it? I'd ask for her to have to post a huge bond every year before the child is sent and she has to pay for all transportation both ways and someone has to accompany the child until whatever age... At a minimum. Japan is notorious for siding with moms and not letting children come home if mom won't do it.

donna

[Pasttimetoleave]

BTW, your stbx is a real POS. It sounds like she is a wild child you tried to tame, and failed.

Tell me something I don't know. Even her mother has told me she thinks her daughter is horrible.

You are doing great. Get it all nailed down and signed and then get her out of the house. You want as much separation and time to pass as possible before her plans completely implode. All it will take is for Mr. Wonderful to start focusing on some other married chick over the internet.

-A4H

Yep that is the plan. Personally I don't care if it works out or not for her. As long as my D5 is safe and sound she can go be happy or unhappy as she pleases. I just don't care.

[Fatheroffour]

Japan has been getting pressure from other nations and is making a show at making reforms but the reforms will be slow to come, if ever.

If your kiddo gets on a plane to Japan with a hostile ex spouse it is highly possible, if not likely, the child will not be returning anytime soon.

[Anything4Her]

If your kiddo gets on a plane to Japan with a hostile ex spouse it is highly possible, if not likely, the child will not be returning anytime soon.

It may be too late, but is it possible to include language that says any international travel has to be in countries that are signatories to the 1980 Hague Convention on the Civil Aspects of International Child Abduction? Japan is not a current signatory.

Personally I don't care if it works out or not for her. As long as my D5 is safe and sound she can go be happy or unhappy as she pleases. I just don't care.

You should hope that her dream holds together for a few years. As long as it does, she is not back trying for more custody.

[Pasttimetoleave]

She's moving to Japan??? She gets the kid in Japan for a summer visit and refuses to send kiddo home, whatcha gonna do about it?
donna

Third, Contact my lawyer to get in contact with the USMC base she will be staying at, Mr. Wonderful is a young active duty marine, and have the base CO return my unlawfully kept child. See I was a Marine, bad PR is one thing they do not like and are quick to shut up. Go through senators, congressman, and press. Keep in mind Mr. Wonderful will be her charge account so keeping my kid would make him an accessory. He can't hide and he will know that or find it out. That part I am truly worried about. Plus if she is giving up our D5 do you think she is going to all of a sudden want her back? She wants to start a new family, and a new life.

Second, D5 doesn't have a passport yet, and it is already stated she can not travel alone until age 15. That is three round trip flights. She will be in Japan before she ever has a electron in her brain fire up and point that out to her. She has no job, no source of income, and doesn't want a child in the way of her couple time. Once she leaves contact is going to almost end.

First, She has still never met this guy face to face. They have never talked over a phone, it is all text and third party pass on information. Now they have advanced to one letter each direction, and dirty pictures of herself from 10 years ago. Even the texts are routed through his brother and his cousin. The only pictures he has of her are from 10+ years ago. The is a hell marry pass for a relationship that was born from stupidity and selfishness.

This is uncontested, I can only get what I can get her to agree to. You think I would end up with as much time with my daughter if I took this to court? I don't. Screw the money aspect of it like court costs, CS, and alimony that I would be forced to pay just look at my time with my daughter that I would lose. Having my daughter 85-100% of the time is not something I would get in court period, look at all the postings here. How often does that happen? I have to pick my battles with her and the time for them. If it comes to that I can and will fight it once the child custody is settled. Not only will I be in a better fighting postion but I will also be able to use her walking out on D5.

Trust me this is one of my greatest fears. Her leaving the country and STBX NJ trying to keep her. That isn't happening for over 16 months from now at least, would be closer to 2 years before she would get the option of getting her for the summer. So I had a choice of choosing to fight that battle now and possibly lose my D5 or a vast majority of the time with her, or fight it when I have more resources, more proof that I am Superdad, more proof that she is a NJ, more money saved specifically for that, and possibly just wait and see if this implodes and the whole issue becomes null and void. For now the correct thing for me to do, I believe, is to wait. I could be wrong, I don't know. You got a better idea I am all ears? This is my game plan at the moment on that issue. It was the best option I could find.

[Pasttimetoleave]

It may be too late, but is it possible to include language that says any international travel has to be in countries that are signatories to the 1980 Hague Convention on the Civil Aspects of International Child Abduction? Japan is not a current signatory.

I can call on that now.(With another client waiting on call back)

Don't know if it matters but she is not from Japan. She is White(irish) not sure what else. Just following a guy to Japan on his tour there.

[justlarry]

Not sure what you can do about it now but my Ex signed the papers saying she did not want to be represented by counsel and understood all that she was signing. After judge signed and made everything a court order the hens got to my Ex and she hired a lawyer. Ex's lawyer filed saying that she was not represented at time of signing and signed "Under Duress". Court allowed the case to be reopened and renegotiated.

In my case the single lawyer was facilitating our agreed upon request and no thought was put in to who we he represented. it was more of a coin flip. Wish he would have represented her and I signed the papers not wanting counsel.

[Pasttimetoleave]

Not sure what you can do about it now but my Ex signed the papers saying she did not want to be represented by counsel and understood all that she was signing. After judge signed and made everything a court order the hens got to my Ex and she hired a lawyer. Ex's lawyer filed saying that she was not represented at time of signing and signed "Under Duress". Court allowed the case to be reopened and renegotiated.

In my case the single lawyer was facilitating our agreed upon request and no thought was put in to who we he represented. it was more of a coin flip. Wish he would have represented her and I signed the papers not wanting counsel.

That I will have to wait and deal with if the time comes. Luckily for me her friends are about as dumb as they come. Her new best friend, hooked her up with Mr. Wonderful, is losing by spades in her divorce at the moment. So divorce looks scary to her at this time.

As long as I can prove that she was walking out to start a new family I don't think that would fall under the "Under Duress" part.