Timeliness of child support payments

[Fatheroffour]

Divorce meant I get to communicate with my ex as little as possible. No more "I wish you'd talk to me."

Defaultuser is on the right track. D being 16, there should be few things you'd feel the need to communicate with your ex about.

[defaultuser]

Sometimes I think that people can be divided into 'askers' and 'doers' which one are you?

Doers aren't concerned too much with the rules and following others lead. They find a way to achieve goals.

Askers are concerned with the way things should be. She should have to do x,y, and z and aren't capable of thinking outside the box to achieve goals and instead are fixated on a narrow view of how things are supposed to be and often try and force others to meet their expectations of fairness.

[newwife]

*sigh* she is being totally ridiculous with you. you pay the child support enforcement agency on-time. how long it takes to get to her bank account is none of your concern.
and if she desparately needs that money on that day, her lifestyle is lacking-and that is also none of your concern(unless it is harming your child).

radio silence. In my state, you can be one full year in arrears before they do something court-wise.

and consider this-if she is paycheck to paycheck and is in desparate need of your child support-how can she pay a lawyer to take you to court???? just sayin!

[kidsdadtexas]

In Texas its due on the 1st but not delinquent until the 1st of the following month.

[grgr]

So..........you would like communication from your ex regarding your daughter that the ex refuses to do (that you can find out elsewhere anyhow) yet you allow unnecessary communication about other issues?

You're giving her the communication SHE wants while not getting the communication YOU want. Where' s the problem?

[ddadks]

Our decree says that we are to agree on healthcare, education etc. with equal input. When enrollment came around with no input from ex I went to school and there she was trying to get me to leave and ranting. Same story with insurance. I've had insurance on D forever but when I had trouble filing claim it was discovered that nj had gotten her own insurance and changed account owner to herself. I have explained the decree to providers but they don't seem (understandably) to want to help. This is the only type of communication I desire with ex. Every attempt at civil comms about D escalates into rants. Only two more years!

[defaultuser]

So if you're paying the insurance, you can password protect the account and keep her from making changes. It typically is best to be proactive in these kinds of things.

At the same time, if she does something stupid, make changes back with these people yourself. From what you describe about her, the only interaction I would have with her is through legal pleadings such as a contempt motion. Talking it out isn't going to get you anywhere.

[k997s]

As i read this i thought i could have written it myself.

NJ had so many changes to how she wants to be paid.

1st cashiers checks only
Then not handed to her but mailed of left at the office.
Now when there is no mail on the 1st she freaks out and tells the kids 'daddy is withholding money from us'
The most ive ever been late is 1-2 days when there is no mail delivery.

kind of funny really... but she has mad a big deal with her lawyer out of this