I need help...

[Southern.Putter]

I'll strongly disagree with this advice. AA is a religious-like cult that does more harm than good. Regarding it's primary purpose, fewer get sober in AA than those who simply quit drinking on their own. And just try speaking your mind about anything other than the 12 Step Program, such as the scientific methods to control the compulsion of drinking, and you will be run out of the room. AA is no different than any other religion, you must subscribe to its tenets to participate - you must believe in a mythical disease that can only be cured by divine intervention.

Sending a man to AA because he can't get over his ex-wife's lies and distortions is really bad advice, Tom.

I trust we are clear on this.

Not to mention the possibility of this future scenario in court, when ex-NJ is pursuing some kind of power- or money-grab claim.

{OP is sitting in the witness chair and being questioned by opposing counsel}
"So, Mr At-My-Wits-End, your former wife now tells us that you have a substance abuse problem. Have you ever attended an AA meeting for help?"

OP: "uhhh, well, errrr, you see, it's like this, your honor..."

Guaranteed nightmare scenario. PLEASE don't go to anything like AA unless you really do have a substance abuse issue, otherwise you will be leaving yourself wide open to being gutted in court. Also, if you do go, don't mention it to anyone.

[Fatheroffour]

Join AA. This is no joke!! What you've described is "living life on life's terms." And, it sucks!!

There's a lotta healing that goes on @ AA that a therapist can't touch. For example, you'll find that you're not alone. In fact, you'll find that there's others that are much worse off than you. Moreover, you're allowed to speak your mind and no one will use it against you. At AA, every heart-breaking topic known to humanity is open for discussion.

Try it. Nothing ventured, nothing gained.

Tom

I have a sudden urge to watch Fight Club.

[RC211V]

Can't see the pic... have a feeling it'll make me laugh, so fix it for us?

[At-My-Wit's-End]

In the 18 months since your divorce, have you achieved any personal accomplishments?

Well?

Have you?

That is your path to "getting over it."

I think I've done ok in the 'trying new things' stakes... I've learnt to rollerskate (for the girls), I've learnt to ride a motorcycle (for myself), though I'm not safe on it yet, I'm beginning drum lessons next week and I'm back at the gym 3 to 4 time a week. I've also re-painted much of the house and really started to make it mine, rather than 'our old place'.