Custody

[Shiatan]

I have already went through custody of my 2 daughters so court hearings I can pretty much hold my own where they are concerned but, I have a 3 year old son by an ex gf...we didn't date long before she got pregnant so really didn't know much about her...I took a DNA test, am the father..set up child support ect...apparently my support wasn't supplemental to help, it supported her, her bf, and her other son who's father has dodged paying for years but that's another story...now, back in October 2011, her brother and mother took both her boys..she was to them hooked on painkillers and they didn't think she needed them with her...I didn't know this until December when I went to get him for Christmas and couldn't reach her...when I did finally hear from her on the 27th, she told me I could get him on the 1st...I said ok...on the 28th, she called saying her brother wouldn't let her have him because she slept 30 hours at a time and didn't think it safe..I agreed but told her he needs to be with me, if not her..I have had him since December 31...its been almost 5 months with me, almost 7 total that he hasn't been with his mother..child support still goes to her...I filed for custody...her other son has been with his father since January ...I told her I filed..certified letter has been ignored and now she says I want him back....I refused...basically we never had court over custody of any type...does that mean I have as much legal right to keep him as she says shexhas to come get him

[dadmisseskids]

basically we never had court over custody of any type...does that mean I have as much legal right to keep him as she says shexhas to come get him

Yes.

.I filed for custody.....I told her I filed..certified letter has been ignored and now she says I want him back.

Are you saying that the court didn't send her the order to appear in court, you did? What is the court doing about getting her served or her refusal to accept the letter? There are no court dates scheduled?

[Shiatan]

Courts sent her certified..she texted me asking if I sent her a letter from the courts..I told her yes, I filed a motion for custody..the first attempt was may 4th..she wasn't home but received the postal slip saying she had a letter to pick up...second notice was in her mail 7 days later...letter was returned undelivered after 15 days...( I work at the post office, not the office in her town but do have ways of checking on delivery attempts) she is just ignoring it...if she doesn't get it, she can say she knew nothing about what it is for...my next option is to send the sheriff department but has to be to her last known address and I know she wont get it.. she is staying at her grandmothers now...I know the town but not the address so can't get her served there...my attorney says a default can be filed but only after all reasonable attempts to get her notified has been tried so it will just drag on...

[dadmisseskids]

my next option is to send the sheriff department but has to be to her last known address and I know she wont get it.. she is staying at her grandmothers now.

Use her grandmother's address.

my attorney says a default can be filed but only after all reasonable attempts to get her notified has been tried so it will just drag on...

There is a limit as to how long it can drag on. Have her served at work if you have to.

[Fatheroffour]

You should review the links in my signature. Pay particularly close attention to issues such as Radio Silence. Its already cost you a service and probably more.

[Shiatan]

I can't get her served at her grandmother ..know the town but not the address and she doesn't have a job

[Fatheroffour]

"Can't"

There is no can't. Only do.

Hire a professional. If the law can find them then a process server can too.

[dadmisseskids]

I can't get her served at her grandmother ..know the town but not the address

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PI?

[Shiatan]

no can't only do isn't helpful..I've said I don't know much about her and being at her grandmother is just that..I don't know her name, address ect..just like she wouldn't have a clue to my grandmother's name..so like I said...can't get her served there ..Lexington ky is the 2nd largest town in my state and knowing the town she is staying in does me no good..And hire a professional? Legal fees killing me as it is so extra funds to hire someone to find her isn't an option...I asked originally if we haven't had any custody order do I have as much right to keep him as she says she does to come get him..I've refused to send him back to her and will wait it out but as long as she avoids notice its just dragging

[Anything4Her]

She has left your son for the last 5 months with you. She has made no attempt to come get him, though presumably she knows where you live.

I would not hand over the kid until the matter gets in front of a judge. If she wants a shot at custody, she will have to surface and be served.... or have you served.

Relax, you are building a history of being the primary parent. Let's hope this situation continues another 7 months.