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I've been divorced for 2 years now and we have a 4 yr old son together. Ex has been dating a guy for six months and they are getting serious. Our decree states he isn't supposed to spend the night which I don't believe he is. However, he is tucking my son into bed with him at night, getting in bed with him at night when he does it, and kissing him on the cheek and forehead when he tucks him into bed and whenever he leaves. I've spoken with ex about it and she obviously could care less. This makes my blood boil. Am I making a mountain out of mole hill? If I'm not, what is the appropriate response and how best should I handle this?
Thanks for teaching me a new word Bart. I would say all four but there's nothing I can do about the fact he is there and I am not. I would rather a guy show my son kindness, care, and concern than the flip side so I really have no problem with affection...it's this type of affection. My issue is that my son's bed is no place for him to be regardless of how serious they are. getting in my son's bed should be off limits and, yes, i find it inappropriate to be kissing my son on the face (not mouth) in that setting. But that's just me and, of course, I'm biased as this is my son. I don't like it and want it to stop.
yup 6 months is way too soon and risky to involve a new partner in your kids life. i feel sorry for the kid if it doesn't work out. glad mom feels so comfortable in risking your son's well-being with mr. wonderful.
The OP doesn't even think the guy is spending the night. The guy is taking a few minutes break from fingering mom on the couch to tuck kiddo in and it makes the OP's blood boil. That's not healthy. Neither is questioning the 4yo about his going to bed habits at his moms house.
i guess everyone has their own values. i've been dating a woman with 3 kids. tucking them in "in my book" especially at 4 years old is mom and dads job. its a little more intimate at that age than just a night, night...for the kid.