Day Care Receipts - What to do?

[dadinnj]

Hello all, I am new to this site. I look forward to contributing in the future. I am having an issue with my ex right now that I wanted to run by you.

My ex takes my son to a private, in-home day care. The woman who runs the program doesn't take checks, so payments are made in cash. I typically just add my portion (76 percent) onto my weekly child support check. Lately, the day care operator has stopped sending me weekly receipts. She used to do this without any issues, but for the past month or two I haven't received anything.

I sent a text to the operator last week nicely asking for the receipts. She responded, somewhat harshly, asking why I need them. I said I simply needed them for my records. Her response was that she knows I don't get the day care credit, so she didn't feel she had to give them to me. I kindly asked again, saying I am still paying her as a business and businesses give receipts. I didn't get a response to that. Two days later I asked her again "will I be able to get those receipts?". This resulted in a quick phone call from my ex saying that woman called her and said that I am "harrassing her."

My ex then went on to interrogate me about why I need this receipts. For me, it's two part. One, I want to make sure the money I pay is going to day care. Second, I my ex has pulled stunts with money in the past and I don't trust her.

Do I have any legal ground for the daycare woman to provide receipts?

[Trevor]

Nope. And you sure don't have to pay her either.

Meaning, if you expect to be paid by me going forward, receipts will be required as you have provided them in the past, with your TIN or SSN provided.

[anonymous guest]

Do not send the $ to your Ex. Pay the daycare directly.
There are two possible issues:

One, If you keep paying extra in CS, then your ex could go back to court to get that amount all the time. It may not be clear that that "extra" amount is for daycare.
Two, your Ex may not even be paying what she says she is, and is pocketing the "extra."

Generally speaking, always pay the service provider (daycare, doctors, dentist, school, etc) directly.

[dadinnj]

Trevor -

I am tempted to tell the provider that. But if she still won't do it and I stop paying, am I not in violation for not paying my portion?

All of this over a simple receipt.

[Trevor]

You have a right to a receipt for business services, including documentation of the hours the service is provided and the cost. She has no right to question the purpose for your receipt request. It is probably because she is failing to report the income to the IRS and doesn't want to get caught. Well that's just NOT your problem. Either she provides you with a receipt, or you'll just start mailing checks. Or you'll find a legitimate day care to which the kids will be going.

Send your X an email/letter stating the change in funding, immediately. "Going forward, I am no longer including child care in your monthly child support payments. Instead I will be paying the provider directly."

[Groundhogday]

You have a right to a receipt for business services, including documentation of the hours the service is provided and the cost. She has no right to question the purpose for your receipt request. It is probably because she is failing to report the income to the IRS and doesn't want to get caught. Well that's just NOT your problem. Either she provides you with a receipt, or you'll just start mailing checks. Or you'll find a legitimate day care to which the kids will be going.

Send your X an email/letter stating the change in funding, immediately. "Going forward, I am no longer including child care in your monthly child support payments. Instead I will be paying the provider directly."

That is my thought as well. She is doing this under the table. Unfortunately, you have to have a receipt because documentation is everything for divorced parents.

[dobradavid]

Cash only - the DC provider is not reporting at least some of the income.

Possibly your wife is hiding something also.

The way to get a receipt is to persuade her to change - or change providers.

[Outis]

Or give her a check and tell her to deal with it. One check, and suddenly I was getting receipts. Funny how that happens.

[whatnow?]

You should also demand a copy of the contract. If this person is running a legitimate day care facility, then there should be an information contract with pricing included on the contract.

The fact that the operator only accepts cash indicates that this is not only not a legitimate (as in LICENSED) facility, but that the operator is fraudulently hiding income from the government. You are not required to pay for something without proof that it is where the money is going. You have proof that you are paying your CS because you write the NJ a check. Without a receipt for the daycare, there is nothing that shows you have paid it and the NJ can turn around and say you HAVEN'T paid it, therefor you are in arrears, you get cited for contempt, you then have to pay her all the money she CLAIMS you owe, plus court fees, etc., PLUS possibly get your CS modified to a higher amount because you have shown the court you can afford it. Get the picture?

I also believe that you can insist that she use a LICENSED AND INSURED day care facility. If my kiddo was being cared for by someone who was not family on a consistent basis, I know I would demand it. Fortunately, I am the CP and it's not an issue.

[Fatheroffour]

There are many instances where it is perfectly legal to be or use a license-exempt childcare provider. Barring unusual circumstances you cannot force the other parent to use a state licensed/insured CCP.

Just one of many examples, a live in nanny isn't required to have a license.