is this extortion or am I over reacting

[dobradavid]

Look in to www.prosper.com

Yes she will sign an agreement that says I will give her $6000.

I can come up with $3000, but she says if that is all I can give her then she is off to a lawyer.....which of course she says I will have to pay for hers as well as mine

now the lawyers get to make some......

You have $3,000 in cash on hand...or that's all you can come up with? Come up with the other $3,000 by whatever means necessary. Beg, borrow, or steal it if you have to. Sell stuff (i.e. electronics, ammunition, hock your ring, cash out stocks/retirement plans, etc.). Take a cash advance on a credit card (or take one out if you don't have one). Seriously...come up with that money and get rid of her NOW.

You can avoid one hell of a miserable experience if you sit down and focus on coming up with that money. A divorce sucks enough as it is. You have the chance to have it over with before it's really begun.

To put it in perspective. I was only with my wife for 11 months (separated now). To date...this separation/divorce has cost me WELL OVER $6,000 and I've only been separated for ~four months. $1,355/month for a mortgage on a house that I can't use, $450/month on utilities, $431 month on health insurance, $209/month on her car, and $116/month on her car insurance. That's not counting the $3,000+ that I've already spend on attorney fees (I'm due to pay another $2,500).

I guarantee that you'll be on the hook for more than the amount above if you let her dig her heels in. Hell...if she files and asks for it...one of two things will happen: 1. She'll get sole use of YOUR HOUSE (temporarily), or 2. You'll be on the hook for helping her to fund her apartment anyways. Think about it man.

All she's got to do to make #1 stick for months is say that you hit her. You'll get escorted off the property by LEO's, a protective order placed on you, and you'll have to go crash on a friends sofa.

Edit: Do one of two things. 1. Pay her the $6,000. or 2. If you can't come up with the $6,000...wait until she leaves the house to go somewhere, change the locks, and deny her access. At least that way...regardless of what happens in the short term, you'll have a roof over your head.

[Mark Aylward]

Without question, prepare the document, get the funds by any means possible and get ink to paper ASAP. Make sure the document is airtight and educate yourself on State law regarding her ability to come back if circumstances change.
If you have time, copy all your records and get an insurance guy to come by and give you a written estimate of the contents of your home, any valuables, etc. In other words, have documented proof of everything and stick it in a safety deposit box with a signed copy of the document.
She'll try and come back later once she tells a few people and realizes her mistake. Button it up dude.
My attorney's retainer was more than $6000:)

Move swiftly grasshopper...
Mark

[kangaroocourt]

You have no kids, correct?
I strongly disagree with the advice on this forum. Personally, I wouldn't give her one penny if I were in this situation...(exception: if the whole thing were my fault).
Instead, I would be carrying my voice recorder with me at all times.