Not paying mortgage, car payments etc...what to do

[BartSimpson]

Valid point, Trevor.

However, by the time it gets in front of a Judge, it will likely have self-resolved.

Somehow, people without cars manage. What if the STBX lost her Driver's License?

[aero_8]

The OP never mentioned whether he had any interest in keeping either the house, or the car. Different tactics if you'd like to keep them, versus get rid of them. Either way you do it, stop making the payment for her. If she has possession, and use, she pays. You'll save yourself a ton of money. That's worth more than a credit score, which can always be rebuilt.

[finallyhappyhere]

The car title and loan are in my name. The house deed and mortgage are in both.

I want the house for sale, she's dragging her feet and refusing to get it ready for sale. I've been paying the mortgage. She changed the locks and will not provide the keys.

She has the keys to the car and wont make the payment.

I just went to JDR court and she received no spousal support because we had a vocational expert. The different in my pay to her pay is huge, so I'm very surprised. Either way, judge ruled in my favor. She's appealing.

I JUST filed for divorce, so her response to the complaint and a PSA from her are in the works. I just want this done as soon as possible. I'm willing to give in, but not willing to drag this on forever and be stuck paying the bills. At this point, I would have been better being forced to pay spousal support so the judge would have made her pay those other payments.

I'm at the end of my rope here.. sorry guys... I'm venting and I know you've all been through it, or something like it. Sad, depressed, frustrated...

[finallyhappyhere]

I gave her an ultimatum. Pay up in 2 weeks for the car or I'm selling it. I can get access to a key via the dealership and the VIN. However, that's only a door key. It's got one of those keys that has a chip in it. I was told that if I don't have either key I have to replace the computer to get new keys..cost about $600. Jeez.

I'm considering opening it up and putting a club on it. I can't sell it without the keys.

Thoughts?

[BartSimpson]

Steering wheel "clubs" are useless.

Professional car thieves use them as leverage to break the steering wheel interlock, or simply use bolt cutters to cut the steering wheel itself and it's off in 10 seconds.

And the vehicle could be subject to a 72 hour parking rule, so your time is limited - it can't just sit. To be honest, I would worry about it getting vandalized if it sits in her driveway, being symbolic of you.

Tow it to a safe location under your complete control.

Once it is secure, a little social engineering might work to get the keys, or you can shop around for a good deal. There are a number of ways around the whole "computer chip" thingy which really is just to keep honest people honest.

Dude, ultimatums don't work. Telegraphing your intentions, she is just going to hide it in two weeks, or up the ante with some other bovine scat. If she is going to cough up the cash, it's only going to be 15 minutes after you tow the car away.

[blueTexas]

If you're worried about being held responsible for her vehicular transportation, replace the car with a cheap one. Say, a $2k car in place of a $20k one.

[hanzblinx]

My ex wife got her car (loan in both names) towed before she even filed for divorce. She left the state and was planning to establish residency then divorce, trying to get her parents on board to pay for her lawyer. I stopped making payments, when I got a call from the the lender I said "tow it now!". They did.

Sure it trashed my credit, but that was really the least of my problems. Her parents stepped in and bought her a brand new car the next day. They also hired her an attorney so she filed divorce before she obtained out of state residency, which was more important than credit.

[Hopin4daBest]

Have you tried going down to the station and asking to speak to a detective about exercising your right to get your car?
He may likely tell you it's marital property and a court matter, or you might get lucky and he sends a squad car for a stand by to get the keys.
It's worth a shot, and it's free.

[demurrer]

Where is she keeping the keys? Just have a buddy come with you to the house, find the keys, and drive the car to a location she can't find. Come back to the house and tell her you gave the car back to your bank/loan company.

If you take the car in your name away from your wife a Judge will bring you to your knees financially to punish you. If the repo man takes it you're off the hook.

When the car is titled individually that doesn't mean it is separate property while divorce litigation is pending.

The court sees it as depriving your stbx of transportation that is marital property. You won't receive a criminal punishment and the police won't get involved, but you may find yourself paying for a replacement and being cast as villan that the OC will ride along with for the remainder of the divorce to show the judge you really are a dirty PoS.

Motion the court for exclusive use and posession of the car, make the payments, or call the car lender and tell them the location of the car.

Ultimatiums don't work. You think you're a guy trying to get your property back. Her attorney will use it against you to show you're an a-hole.