anyone buy out a ex?

[nevermorenevermore]

We have a fellow here - coscrewed - who has the Colorado thing pretty sorted out for a layman. If he doesn't happen along soon, I suggest you reach out to him for some pointers.

I think coscrewed's strategy is pretty simple, do not get divorced in Colorado if at all possible.

What's your status? Divorce filed, thinking about divorce, wife on the verge of filing?

she filed last week.

[BartSimpson]

Do not move out of the house - has there been any suggestion of that?

Somehow I don't think that she's doing the heavy lifting of filing, and then, just abandoning the kids and marriage to go find herself - more likely she's looking for you to leave.

You must have some clue what she is planning on doing - you know - her goals?

[nevermorenevermore]

Do not move out of the house - has there been any suggestion of that?

Somehow I don't think that she's doing the heavy lifting of filing, and then, just abandoning the kids and marriage to go find herself - more likely she's looking for you to leave.

You must have some clue what she is planning on doing - you know - her goals?

im not going to move out (thanks, i did read THE LIST). she is being civil, she wants me around the kids/etc to give her a break/etc. (logging time, too, thanks!)

as to her goals, since i don't know what they are, i guess that is the problem. all i know now is she wants to go back to school and become a nurse. i asked her last week what she was planning on doing, and she said it was none of my business. honestly, i don't think she is thinking about the future very much. just short term pain relief.

she filed once before, 2 years ago. we "reconciled". (she went back to being "trapped" by me, according to her) then she attempted suicide 2 months ago. i took care of the kids for 2 weeks while she recovered in the hospital. she is in counseling and doing better than she has in a long time, but guess she thinks getting rid of me will somehow make it better. maybe she's right. i just wish she would give our marriage a shot with her being healthy for once.

i don't think there is a "mr wonderful" yet, she hates all men due to past issues as a young teen.

[Fatheroffour]

Red flags all around. A 'survivor', hates men, maybe suicidal, Colorado. You got your hands full, buddy.

[hoosier_dad]

then she attempted suicide 2 months ago. i took care of the kids for 2 weeks while she recovered in the hospital. she is in counseling and doing better than she has in a long time, but guess she thinks getting rid of me will somehow make it better. maybe she's right.

You do have some leverage there for settling custody issues.

Some of the sites I'm finding state the threshold for lifetime alimony in Colorado is 20 years, but the guys from that state will know better. Also the standard temporary alimony calculations are rough, 40% of your gross - 50% of hers. Appears that is the default for couples earning 75k and less, and is adopted by a lot of judges for higher earnings. I can't even imagine surviving financially after losing 40% of my gross income + child support for 5 children.

I hope you get some good news but unfortunately we hear nothing but horror stories out of Colorado.

[nevermorenevermore]

Red flags all around. A 'survivor', hates men, maybe suicidal, Colorado. You got your hands full, buddy.

your forgot the "5 kids" part...

well, thanks for the back slaps and advice thus far....

[BartSimpson]

You know your part in this crazy making, right?

I wonder how you can go about getting a clear perspective on your circumstances?

Attorney? Therapy? What'cha going to do?

[nevermorenevermore]

You know your part in this crazy making, right?

I wonder how you can go about getting a clear perspective on your circumstances?

Attorney? Therapy? What'cha going to do?

meet with attorney monday. therapy...yep. gonna keep reading and posting here, this is a great resource