Can anyone be trusted?

[texasdad2012]

Thanks, guys, for the comments and insight. A lot for me to think about here. I probably relate most to what defaultuser said about having a different perspective on life now. Sadly, my new perspective is more cynical and less idealistic that it once was, and that may make me a less trusting and forgiving husband if it ever comes to that again, but maybe that's a good thing.

What I went through was definitely an eye-opener for me, and I sure don't underestimate what women are capable of anymore, or the extents to which they will go to manipulate outcomes in their favor.

[jamessick]

It comes down to a different style of trust. In what DU says there is a lot of truth. You get in a relationship and YOU put in 100%. That is all you can control. You put in everything and see the return on your investment. Less investment coming back and it's something that cannot be fixed, walk away. So, the question should be, are you willing to give 100% to a woman in the future. If she isn't giving 100%, you should know. See and obey the red flags. Work on yourself too. Be the best you can be.

[texasdad2012]

That's a good way of explaining it. Honestly, I know I wasn't giving 100% during the last few years of my marriage, and neither was she. It's hard to always appreciate someone as much as you once did, and I know we were on auto-pilot (and not on a good heading). It would definitely have been worth trying to fix but by the time I clued-in to the red flags it was too late and past the point of repair, mostly because she had already checked-out by then.