Son is having 2 problems

Parental Alienation Syndrome, Malicious Mother Syndrome, dealing with the ex, and various other non-legal concerns throughout the process.

Son is having 2 problems

Postby Lostdadof1 » Thu Aug 09, 2012 9:42 am

The first is potty training, we had started him down this road. Then STBX did her thing, and stopped trying. Now he has regressed, and isn't interested at all, I would like to get back on track with this, I cant be the only one who has had this problem, but I don't find much. Anyone found a good method, or book that might help?

The second I posted about once before. My son is very smart for his young age, he knows something is very off. Since my first post I have really turned the corner, I embraced my role as super dad and really try to enjoy every second with him. Despite that he is very afraid of me not being around him, daycare confirms that he looks for me all the time. I can't control what she does, but I want to find a way to assure him I am not going anywhere. He wants to sleep in my bed, or me to sleep on his floor. Never did that when he was a baby, don't want to start now. How do you tell a 2 year old that daddy isn't going to leave him? This new behavior actually upsets me more than NJ's social life, she is clearly less than happy right now, hell I get upset when she doesn't leave at night these days. Her behavior is directly responsible and I just want him to feel safe when he goes to bed at night, or I am at work.
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Re: Son is having 2 problems

Postby Fatheroffour » Thu Aug 09, 2012 9:55 am

Float a Cheerio in the bowl and make a game of trying to sink it.

Most boys and men love such games and he should be back on track in no time.
Everyone lies.
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Re: Son is having 2 problems

Postby BubbaGumpShrimp » Thu Aug 09, 2012 7:56 pm

Get him a potty training sticker chart. Make it fun for him and he'll stay interested. The other thing we did with NJ's kids was get M&M's and Reese's Pieces. A successful #1 in the toilet got them 1 piece of candy. A #2...two pieces.

On bed time...you've got to establish a consistent routine and stick with it (if you haven't already). Lay down and read a story, come up with a song that you sing every night, etc.

What you REALLY need to do is somehow get through to his Mom what she's doing to him.
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Re: Son is having 2 problems

Postby a dad » Thu Aug 09, 2012 9:13 pm

For potty training, we did the positive reinforcement with candy, too. We'd say "good job" and give 'em a skittle even if they were close. I remember that random reinforcements work better than constant ones but I'm not sure how that works if there's zero at moms house. Perhaps buy her a bag of skittles and try to get her back on-board, even just once in a while.

For the abandonment thing, I like the set schedule (in crayon) but have yet to get STBX to conform and your's is probably too young to comprehend. I do tell them (D5, D5, S9) that I'm like a rock and I'm not going anywhere. I may be at work or you may be at (pre)school or moms but I'll always be here when you come to dads. (Followed by a big hug) Repeat, repeat, repeat. They naturally still miss each parent when they're away for a few days, but that's just luv. At two he may not get everything but I believe the way you say it has more of an impact.
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Re: Son is having 2 problems

Postby justlarry » Thu Aug 09, 2012 9:47 pm

Fatheroffour wrote:Float a Cheerio in the bowl and make a game of trying to sink it.


"You sunk my Battleship"
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Re: Son is having 2 problems

Postby Friday » Sat Aug 11, 2012 11:20 am

he's only 2. relax, he wont be climbing on the school bus with a load in his diaper in 3 years. problem 2...your sons adjustment to his familys break up is a direct result of how well you and his mother handle the situation. keep practicing
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Re: Son is having 2 problems

Postby atoice » Sun Aug 12, 2012 7:40 am

Everyone said make potty training fun. we haven't even started due to divorce, but I am using the Cheerio concept. Reward him as you see fit. That's good bonding for you and him. If she doesn't want to, better time for you on his development.

Remind him you love him. Keep instilling that you aren't going anywhere and you will see him soon. I had an issue Friday in regards to this, and I reminded him I would see him for bed.
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