Making a Tragedy Worse

[Alabama_Father]

On June 2, 2012 my ex-wife was shot to death by her boyfriend, in her home while my children were asleep in their beds. The following is a timeline to the event and what followed after the event that ended with the Madison Sheriff dispatching 3 officers to my home to remove my children from my care and from the state of Alabama by their grandparents who reside in Kansas.

June 1, approximately midnight, my ex-wife and her boyfriend were hauling a boat from his parents house, I do not know where they were heading but assume it was my ex-wife's house since the children (all 3 of my daughters and his daughter) were in the house.
He drove up to a Check Point and failed to pass the sobriety test which resulted in him being arrested for a DUI shortly after midnight in Sedgwick Kansas.
My ex-wife drove the truck and boat back to his parents house, detached the boat and proceeded to the Sedgwick jail where she posted bond or bail for him. This was his second DUI, the first was in 2010
They returned to my ex-wife's house at approximately 2:30 in the morning.
Over the next several hours I am unsure what occurred that resulted in my ex-wife's death, as there were only 2 people involved in what happened; one is now in jail and the other is deceased as of 5:30AM, June 2nd when she was shot.
My oldest daughter called 911 and made the report that her mother was shot.
Either my daughter or my ex-wife's boyfriend got all of the children out of the house and they were waiting on the front lawn when the police arrived. Thank God he held his presence of mind and did not harm my children....thank God.
I was notified of her death at approximately 11:30am on June 2nd, I packed and headed to Kansas to take care of my children as quickly as I could.
The first night the children stayed in their Grandmother's home. The second night (June 3) after I had arrived they stayed with me at my hotel in Kansas....I kept the middle daughter and youngest daughter with me, the eldest declined the opportunity and continued to stay with her Grandmother.
The next Monday (June 4) we started family grief counseling.
My oldest son (Griffin) was flown to Kansas for his step-mother's funeral. He also attended grief counseling with the family and provided insight into the loss of a parent (his mother had died in 2006 from a heart condition) and how a child feels. He further stated, as did a couple of counselors, that it would have been an easier transition for him had he been allowed to stay put for at least a month after his mother's death
Based upon Griffin's statement and the advice of counselors, I decided to remain in Kansas for the recommended 30 days. I told my oldest daughter we would all return to Alabama on July 2nd, 1 month.
We continued with counseling in Kansas. I started contacting schools and counselors in Alabama.
Under advise from my attorney, I was told the children were mine under the laws of the state of Alabama (my ex and I lived here from 2001 to 2008, our divorce was in November of 2008 here in Alabama, our youngest daughter was born here) and that I would be acting in accordance with Alabama law when I brought them home.
I started to get real uncomfortable with the family, there were no discussions regarding finance, no discussions regarding the children other than my telling them all that my intention was to bring all of my children to Alabama on July 2nd.
On June 27th I received two phone calls; one from an Attorney in Wichita Kansas, who wanted to discuss alternative care for the children (voice mail) and a second from a counselor who also wanted to discuss alternative care for my children.
At this point I was nervous and concerned that the family was up to something that would result in my losing my children yet again. I called my family attorney and double checked my decision to remove the 2 younger girls immediately. He was not available so I spoke with another attorney at the firm, who reiterated that I was acting within my rights and that I could remove my children from Kansas at anytime.
I decided to leave my oldest daughter with her Grandmother and return for her on July 2nd, she was incredibly upset regarding the pending move and I thought the youngest 2 girls should not be exposed to additional trauma....
I packed my car; I put my 2 youngest daughters in the car and headed for Alabama. We crossed the state line and were in Oklahoma by 6:30 the evening of the 27th.
We arrived home in Alabama on the 28th of June at approximately 4PM.
It should be noted that I always have the children with me beginning June 15 thru July 15th per the divorce decree in which I share joint custody.
The girls were tired and a little perplexed...but otherwise okay. Their brother came over; we took the girls to the community pool and came back to the house for a pizza dinner. After dinner my middle daughter and I sat on the back porch with my wife while my youngest played video games with Griffin.
My wife and my middle daughter discussed going shopping the next day since the girls had very few clothes...their Grandmother had refused on several occasions to give me their clothes but instead said I could trade their clothes in for more....I could not have them all.
We went to bed early the evening of the 28th
The next morning we got up and started the day; there were contractors in the house as we had started a remodeling project on the upstairs bath to better suit the fact that 3 girls would be sharing a bathroom fulltime
At 11:30 on the 29th of June, the Madison County Sheriffs Dept dispatched 3 officers to my house and served me with an "Amended Ex Parte Order of Protective Custody". The order listed the following reason for extraction of my daughters from my home; "reasonable efforts are not required to maintain the children in the home because an emergency exists which threatens the safety of the children", the order placed the children in the protective custody of the petitioner (their Grandmother via a local lady who was friends with my ex-wife who would take immediate custody locally).
The order further said I was a danger to my children and invoked a Federal law; the "Uniform Child Custody Jurisdiction and Enforcement Act" (UCCJEA).
The deputies put my two daughters in a police car and took them away at approximately 11:15. This was the second time my daughters were traumatized by being placed in a police car and removed from a parent’s home in less than 30 days.
The order said I had to be in court at 8am the next day or I would lose my children....I was 800 miles away w/o counsel in Kansas.
I went to my family attorney’s office and he authored an "Expediency Motion to Continue" on my behalf.
We received word at about 2pm on June 29th that the date was changed to July 9th for the hearing in Kansas. We were granted a second continuance to July 13.
The hearing occurred July 13, 2012. I lost and now we are headed to a trial on August 17, 2012.
These folks have a lot of money and a lot of local reach and influence in Kansas....no one wants to touch me with a ten foot pole there......I am being railroaded.

Here is what I do not really understand....I am a danger to my children and I lack the ability to act in their best interest....there has never been an incident where I have placed my daughters at risk....I had secured a local counselor, who had assured me that I had waited an adequate amount of time (30 days) prior to removing the children from the state of Kansas. I worked with my attorney and did what I was told was legally correct....I am continuing to look for help...but have not been able to acquire any...

I am a retired veteran of the United States Air Force. I served proudly for 20+ years, working everyday with my fellow Airmen and Airwomen to protect the United States of America. I have always believed in the Constitution; a document intended to protect us all and preserve our rights. Now I look up and realize that what I fought so hard for along with my fellow service members can be taken away. Basic rights to every man, woman and child can be removed through the judicial system. What happened to the 14th Amendment? Does anyone remember it?

14th Amendment, section 1; All persons born or naturalized in the United States, and subject to the jurisdiction thereof, are citizens of the United States and of the state wherein they reside. No state shall make or enforce any law which shall abridge the privileges or immunities of citizens of the United States; nor shall any state deprive any person of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law; nor deny to any person within its jurisdiction the equal protection of the laws. These are pretty powerful words. Unfortunately they have no power in our country now, we all serve the government, not the other way around.

I was in a very bad marriage with my ex-wife where I suffered from verbal and physical abuse...I met a woman, had an affair, attempted to return to my then wife and work on our relationship for the sake of the children. The relationship fell completely apart when after I had a vasectomy, she kneed me in the groin.

After that abuse, I determined that the cycle of abuse had to end or someone would end up in jail....I did not want that someone to be me. Looks like that someone is my ex-wife's boyfriend...what a shame. She was a violent woman behind closed doors.

I am now married to the woman I had an affair with...we have been married for 3 years. We still live in Alabama. We made a mistake but I swear as God is my witness, an affair is not always the worst act you can perpetrate against a spouse as evidenced by what happened in Wichita.

My ex-wife worked hard to alienate me from my children...with a great deal of success. My oldest has been told that I left them...I abandoned them. She was provided details and exposed to things as a 9 year old child(at that time), should never have seen or heard....through my ex-wife's actions and her inability to make good responsible decisions, she exposed my children to a great deal of danger...there was a man in her house with a gun she knew about....drinking. My children could be dead right now.....but I am the bad guy? I am a danger to my children? Really?

Their grandmother has them picked up and put into a sheriff’s car, providing the children with her version of "proof" that their dad is incapable of having their best interests at heart...that he is incapable of being a good parent.

When I returned to Kansas to see my children and prepare for the hearing, my middle daughter told me that per her Grandmother, I had broken the law….my children are now afraid of me….unbelievable! A week earlier my youngest daughter was cruising around my house wearing bunny ears and Groucho Marks glasses, giving me hugs and kisses…now she cries and runs away from me.

My heart is broken.

It is amazing to me that Father's have no rights when it comes to children. The judge told me in court on the 13th of July that I am a fit dad but that I put too much emphasis on work and that I placed work above my children, yet, had I not worked I could not have paid the 4000 bucks a month in alimony and child support or the over 100,000 in legal fees trying to keep them in Alabama at the divorce....amazing don't you think....

I love my children with all of my heart....I never expected to have the opportunity to live with them and raise them up to become fine young women....just when I receive the opportunity, even through a tragedy....someone intercedes, invokes the law, gets lawyered up, takes your children and assumes they are better than the actual parent at making decisions for your children...I may not be a lot of things, but I am a good dad. Their Grandmother is 68 years old, my youngest daughter is 6. By the time my youngest daughter graduates high school, the Grandmother will be 80....way to old to be raising a teenager and at 68 she is way too old to be raising a little girl.

This is going to cost a fortune...a fortune I do not have...it is not fair for either my girls or me, but I am going to fight for my children...I love them and want them with me. I want what is best for them and I know that as their only living parent...the best person for them is their dad.

Jeff

[Thoughts?]

What were the reasons stated by the court for ruling against you on July 13th?

What was cited as the risk that was posed in the paperwork associated with the motion, i.e., any attached affadavits.

Don't need the rest -- just need to take it down to the legal reasoning here.

[Southern.Putter]

At 11:30 on the 29th of June, the Madison County Sheriffs Dept dispatched 3 officers to my house and served me with an "Amended Ex Parte Order of Protective Custody". The order listed the following reason for extraction of my daughters from my home; "reasonable efforts are not required to maintain the children in the home because an emergency exists which threatens the safety of the children"...
The order further said I was a danger to my children and invoked a Federal law; the "Uniform Child Custody Jurisdiction and Enforcement Act" (UCCJEA).

There's not much we can help with unless we know something about the specific nature of the alleged "emergency" and the reasons that were provided about why you were "a danger" to your children.

The mention of the UCCJEA is not surprising. It is the federal act that enables/compels law enforcement officials in one state to uphold rulings from a judge in another state.

Hopefully, you have directed your attorney aggressively file a counterclaim and have raised an issue with your local judge/court in Alabama, particularly since the divorce order was issued there. You'd be making a big mistake, IMHO, to cede jurisdiction to Kansas without putting up a fight.

[Southern.Putter]

P.S. I would also recommend that you edit your original post and take down the pic. It's not necessary.

Also, remove your name from the signature line and remove your stepson's name. If your ex-wife's parents are any good or if their attorneys are any good, they'll find your posting here by searching for such identifiers. This is a public board, but most guys do alright here by "anonymizing" their postings a little bit. We don't need your name or any of your kids names or anything else in order to help you out.