Custody

[gianno96]

I have been married for 14 years and have always provided a stable and loving home for my child. I sent my son to Catholic School, was very active in my church with my son, and supported him and my family well. My wife is involved in an affair which caused us to separate and begin divorce proceedings. My wife has done some very inappropriate things on the internet and is not setting a good moral foundation for my son. I have since been laid off of my job and she is making substantially more money than me and uses this as a reason why I should not see my son. She states that she can support him better than me and therefore keeps reducing the time I have to spend with him. I am living on an unemployment check, and my son is not going without. I still pay for his schooling,food, shelter and whatever necessities I can. I am actively and aggressively searching for employment, but the opportunities are not forthcoming for me. Since she has more financial resources than I do, and she is the mother, I feel like she holds all the cards and there is nothing I can do prevent her from taking contact with my son away from me. I will end up a weekend dad, and I do not want that for my son. I am also afraid she will move her lover in with her and that is not the moral example I want for my son. She is still wanting me to pay child support, which I have no problem with when I am employed again. What can a father do to get custody when he has no money and the mother has better means of supporting the child financially, even though I can provide better support mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. My son is 14 years old

[nighthawk]

Since you have the time, hit the books, learn the law, and represent yourself.

[Fatheroffour]

To start, you should review the links in my signature.

Son, being 14, will likely have a say in what the custody situation will be and depending on the state may be able to make the choice completely on which parent he wishes to primarily live with.

[newwife]

First of all I have to say-congratulations on having the normally woman advantage.

First time speaking with a lawyer about custody "but father has a job and is stable and responsible, mother won't even work and doesn't have little children to stay home with, how can a judge think that's a better example?"
Because woman doesn't work. she can spend more time with kids. father has good job, priorities are with job. woman will mostly win the job/no job argument.

And she makes more money? good. she can help support YOU with child support while you spend more time with your child.

Is there an agreement in place already? if so, have is modified immediately due to your change in income.
If not, why on earth are you paying child support? pay for his school, buy him clothes, no money is needed to go to her directly. She is not letting you see child? She has no say. if you have no agreement you can have child whenever. when she's at work, pick child up. every day if need be.

stop letting her tell you what you can do. her money is nothing.

[hoosier_dad]

My wife is involved in an affair which caused us to separate and begin divorce proceedings.

Want to explain the circumstances of your separation. I can see her affair being a reason for her to move out and for you and your son to remain the marital household. If you voluntarily moved out simply based on her command you've made the biggest custody mistake you can make.

[stretchkr]

She states that she can support him better than me and therefore keeps reducing the time I have to spend with him.

Nope.