She wants to take kids for fathers day

[Bubba Seal]

I like the idea that you just offer to trade mothers day with her, just sounds good and puts her on the defensive, you might as well get used to this sort of stuff, cause its going to keep on happening.

Good Luck

I guess Im whipped at this point cause I just dont care what day it is in regards to when Im with my kids, I just try to make the best of the time Im with them and dont sweat over all the small stuff.

For me, Birthdays, Mothers day, Fathers day, they are just another day, I learned not to let my ex push my buttons with all of that.

[KeepingMyKids]

I vote with the "go pound sand" contingent.

Even if she offers you a super sweet deal, I'm picturing all the other kids on the Monday after telling stories of what they got to do with their dads the day before while yours have a nifty rain check. Even if she doesn't give a damn about Mother's Day, celebrate your own awesome Dadness with the day for you. Roast the haunch of some dead animal and consume it with your younglings.

[secondhalf]

Don't dishonor Father's Day by giving up your kids on that special day.

[Trevor]

For me, Birthdays, Mothers day, Fathers day, they are just another day, I learned not to let my ex push my buttons with all of that.

Take off the blinders, dude, she pushed a huge button by manipulating you into not giving a rip about Fathers' Day and your birthday. She ate your lunch on this one, hate to say it.

Take it back, it's not too late, always do something special with the kids on Fathers' Day and your birthday. I think for me this year it will be a kayaking journey, maybe this time offshore. The girls always take me to dinner on my birtday as well, which I cherish. Don't miss out on that stuff, man. Don't deprive your kids of it either.

[tsawyer]

Not divorced yet, but inching closer. We negotiated custody ok.

Well, I had planned on a soccer tourney and spending time with the kiddos over Dad's day weekend. Then I looked at a family event invite she recently received that was laying around... And it was for Father's day weekend out of state (6-8 hours away). She wants to bring the kids. She didn't even tell me about it. What do I say? I know it is two months away, but it is supposed to be my weekend, and a tourney for my daughters team.

Maybe I bring the kids to a cabin for mom's day - which happens to be walleye opener here. Stick to my guns or find a way to compromise?

DON'T DO IT. It is dissrespectful of her to even ask for this, and will set a nasty precendent.

[Bubba Seal]

For me, Birthdays, Mothers day, Fathers day, they are just another day, I learned not to let my ex push my buttons with all of that.

Take off the blinders, dude, she pushed a huge button by manipulating you into not giving a rip about Fathers' Day and your birthday. She ate your lunch on this one, hate to say it.

Take it back, it's not too late, always do something special with the kids on Fathers' Day and your birthday. I think for me this year it will be a kayaking journey, maybe this time offshore. The girls always take me to dinner on my birtday as well, which I cherish. Don't miss out on that stuff, man. Don't deprive your kids of it either.

Trevor Im fine and so are my kids, I just dont sweat a day cause its called a certain thing, theres too many other things in life to get worked up about, you do things the way you see it and I am doing it my way, and for me, my way is working for me, and my kids havent missed out on anything. And neither have I.

[Bubba Seal]

Jumbledone, if Fathers day is such a priority to you then change you parenting agreement to reflect that, but in doing that just offer for Mothers day to be her time as a leaf to throw out there.

I recently had to submit my parenting plan to my health insurance company and noticed that in my case my lawyer did put it in there that the kids would spend fathers day with me and mothers day with her, but this mothers day my daughter stayed with me, my son is in college.

Maybe I have blinders on like Trevor seems to think, but my life in regards to my ex is pretty much drama free at this point its taken 8 years to get there, but I dont sweat it if the schedule changes, sometimes its me that needs to change it, sometimes its her.

I used to do what Trevor says he does, plan some big deal for special days, my last birthday I did that, but I had taken on another job because I needed the additional income, so when it came time for my birthday, I told my kids about it, aged 19 and 14 at the time, they both said dad its your day, what would you like to do, I just said remember how we used to watch Forrest Gump over and over again, eating popcorn, and drinking cokes, they said yea, I said I think that would be fun, and we did just that instead of my trying to buy some special thing in thier lives, they gave to me, both said they knew I was tired from all the work I did and they appreciated it, to me that was just priceless, so I think in my world Im doing fine, if we dont get together for special days I always get texts from them.

The only two days that I dont bend on are Christmas, and Thanksgiving. My family has some traditional times to meet for CX, and since the divorce that has been in stone and by the agreement, on the flip side before we got divorced it was our tradition to spend Thanksgiving with her family, so the kids know this and we have stuck to that since the agreement was reached.

But Jumbledone, in response to your question if Fathers day is that big of a priority to you and the ex wont agree with you, to me your only option is to get the parenting agreement changed, then when there is an issue you just go back to the plan.

I can tell you as time moves on, things dont always follow a set routine, Ive learned to bend when I need to or feel I should, but on some things I dont. Its worked for me, my kids and my ex. At this point we are all on the same page when it comes to these things.

Good Luck

[jumbledone]

Per the agreement (unsigned right now, but have been unofficially observing it), Mother's day and Father's day are outlined that the kiddos should spend the day with the respective parent.

Just feel like she offers one thing, then wants it her way if it suits her (the agreement was written by her atty, subject to verification by me and my atty: still reviewing it, tbh).

[Bubba Seal]

Jumble at this point the two of you are involved with a turf war over who has the children the most, I hope you can get this resolved, it does take time, I think in my case it was 2-3 yrs into our agreement, it just takes time and patience.

Good Luck

[DarkCry]

Don't dishonor Father's Day by giving up your kids on that special day.

The End.