ROFR Issue

[Best Dad]

I won my ROFR with only one stipulation.

"when the parent designated to have custody and parenting time with the children IS available, arrangements can be made for one or both of the children to spend time, including overnight with a relative or relative with the children, during the period of time the designated parent IS available".

This clause was added so that either parent could go out or something during their parenting time if they wanted. Needless to say, the judge allowed this clause after my objection.

I caught her going to work last night. I called and asked my sons due to the fact she was at work and unavailable. She refused and gave my boys to her mother. That was the purpose of the ROFR to begin with. Thoughts? I called my attorney to see about charging her with contempt.

[defaultuser]

She's in contempt in my opinion.

I had this same issue. My X basically ignored my objections, R3 letters and such. I hired a PI who documented that she was at work. I subpoena'd her work schedule. I sued her for contempt. I won.

Now she doesn't do that unless she thinks she won't get caught.

[Fatheroffour]

Looks like contempt to me as well. Get a couple of well documented instances and haul her ignorant fat rear back to court.

[Best Dad]

I just payed off my attorney and then fired him. I will represent myself next time...I dont need those vipers. I will get a PI and deal with her on a whole new way. Flipping divorce papers arent worth what they are written on in IL. Sheriff wont help, States Attorney wont help, hell....DCFS wont help. So be it....

[Fatheroffour]

Just for the sake of discussion-----What would you expect the sheriff, state attorney or DFCS to do about it?

This is going to boil down to the quality of your evidence, the presentation of your case and the judge that rules on your case. While there are certain instances where law enforcement might get involved, that is going to be for crimes and not civil contract enforcement, which is basically what we're talking about. Same for the states attorney. ROFR violations are not a crime. DFCS is chartered to save. They have crackhead babies getting raped to deal with as well as all the false reports of women claiming the kids father abused them. ROFR violations are not on their radar.


I know it sucks. You finally get what you want in the order and think things are finally going your way and damn if she didn't throw a wrench in it already. It blows.

It's a battle of wills. Gather your evidence and drag her back again. Eventually, one of you will break. We will be here to cheer you on until you break her.

[Best Dad]

You are right. I am going to do exactly that. I am learning....sad thing is that this whole freaking mess is exhausting and stupid. Just abide by what you agreed on and live your life. To make others miserable is a life lived in stupidity.

[defaultuser]

If you don't have an attorney, she can not get assessed your attorney fees when she's found in contempt.

Money talks a lot more than a slap on the wrist.

[Here_We_Go]

I am considering putting a ROFR in my papers but still want S4 to be able to go to grandma's for an overnight. Grandma likes that. so I guess i will say two nights. So in the ROFR you put that the party who loses the lawsuit has to pay the party who wins the lawsuit attorney's fees. is that how it should be for all departers from the decree.

[Fatheroffour]

12 hour ROFR.

Kid wants to go to grandma's.

Drop kiddo off at grandmas at noon.

Swing by and say goodnight around 9pm.

Pick up kiddo at 8:59 am.

No ROFR violation and even if you fudge the times a little there is zero the courts will do about it even if the other party could somehow prove their case.

[defaultuser]

My opinion is that you should have as short an ROFR as possible, and if you want your ROFR time you do the transportation.

If you want the kids to spend time with Grandma or whatever, just make special exceptions in the decree for it. Just remember, it goes both ways.