Custody of teenager

[fleetwood1]

I am trying to switch custody of my 16.5 year old son from sole to joint (50/50). He is at risk of graduating from H.S since he has failing grades. He wants to stay with me every other week instead of the ever other weekend < parenting time > that I have right now. There are a lot more details but this is the main focus of wanting this change and what is in my son's best interest.
I am about to retain an attorney. Question: During our consultation, he mentioned that we may need a Guardian At Litem. Is that necessary for a child this age?

[BartSimpson]

A 16 year old can pretty much live where he wants - how is a Judge going to force him?

[Fatheroffour]

"Mom, going to dads for the week. Be back Friday. "

What's mom going to do? Freak out and alienate kiddo? A statement to the court by your son could have her EOW.

[fleetwood1]

My son will be signing an affidavit stating his wishes. I was just wondering if a GAL is even needed in this situation? Just a little confused by what the attorney said.

[BartSimpson]

You are making it way too complex - signing an affidavit? No, don't make him write such things down - like FoF said, just have him start staying over. What's Mom going to do?

As for your attorney - he is likely worried about making his car payment, and he plans on soaking you for it over the next year. Do you think your son needs an attorney (GAL) to represent his interests?

[fleetwood1]

No I don't think he needs a GAL. I want to keep this simple and not drag it out.

[Trevor]

How many overnights does he spend at your place now? I think if he simply starts stayng there more, and in a few months you work to have the orders changed, that status quo will be good for you. But summer will be different; you'll need to button it up by fall when school starts. The only hitch is you will be paying CS as you do now, but if you can stomach it (and afford it), then having your kid overnight more now will be more effective than going the atty route. And seriously, a GAL? Come on.

[fleetwood1]

My son does what his mother says and is scared of her. We want to make this legal so we don't have to fight with her about this. In the past, we would get him a few extra nights a month. Now that we have asked for 50/50 she will do everything to manipulate him and threaten. So me pressuring him to stay here every other week with the current situation will just lead to chaos. That is why I am proceeding with a motion to get this taken care of as soon as possible. The mother will not negotiate or mediate.

[Trevor]

Afraid of his mother? What does she think she'll do, tie him up and burn him with her curling iron? What exactly does he fear that a 17yo can't handle?

I don't advocate pushing the kid, but respecting and fearing are two different things, and standing up for his rights is a good exercise in maturity...the less he behaves like a sheep, the better he will be able to handle college and the big wide world out there.

[fleetwood1]

I understand exactly what you are saying. He has low self esteem like his mother and a bit of a loner. What will she do: not talk to him for a very long time like she has done with her parents over the last 4 years. I have told him to buck up and understand he is close to becoming an adult and has great influence on making his own decisions and not be manipulated.