joint custody???

[w2be]

I need enlightenment on the meddlesome ex-mother-in-law pulling strings with no authority...another question...a judges decree does not appear credible, if there is no institution who will enforce what their decisions decree, how come?

[Trevor]

Restate your questions clearly, please.

[w2be]

Does an ex mother-in-law have rights to my daughter because the daughter (the ex) is living in her house.? I am supposed to be enjoying joint custody with my daughter but it appears after months of continuous intervening on the grandmothers part i have lost even the rights to even talk on the telephone to my daughter. It gets crazier and crazier every month.....the question of the judges degree is home come when you call for instance the police, the sheriff,or any agency for that matter, you cannot get one of these agencies to enforce a final decree of judgement ....by a judge..its as if what he says means nothing to some parties and these persons seem to be able to get away with it without so much a slap on the wrist. We get into talking about the relationship they are preventing me to have and develop as a parent and father to my daughter and thats primarily what all this ends up being about in my view.

[KeepingMyKids]

It's a bit difficult to tell what is specifically going on in your situation without details. But for a quick reference, here's a list of all the rights ex-MiL has as pertaining to your child.

1.

Yep, that about covers it.

[newwife]

police have authority to enforce but they often choose not to.

Therefore, you must file contempt in court NOW.

[Trevor]

1. You need to understand your rights as it relates to your orders. Grandparents rights never supercede those of a fit parent, unless court orders grant the gparents time with the kids.

2. Police/Sheriff departments are stretched enough handling criminal matters, so they rarely enforce civil ones. This should not be a surprise.

3. You need to follow orders to the letter and document any and all interference by gparents or your X. Gather several well-documented examples and file a motion for contempt, with the help of a lawyer.

4. Documentation includes but is not limited to...
a. Your current court orders are the baseline documentation of whose time begins/ends when and where
b. Proving you were in the proper location for pickup (buy something at a close-by store and get a dated/timestamped identifiable receipt from that place)
c. Make a phone call at that pickup time to your X or whomever has possession of the kids (your detailed cell phone bill proves this) to ask where are they
d. Object to parenting time interference, calling it out as such, in writing (email, snail mail, but certainly certified mail R3)
e. Allow calls from your X or gparents to go to voicemail; save these messages
f. Save any email or written responses you may get to your communication objecting to their interference

5. You need to learn the system and use it to your advantage to document their alienating behavior. You can't just sit back and allow these morons to get between you and your kids.

6. Stop acting like they are screwing you. The court doesn't care about you. Start focusing on how they are screwing your kids. Document as mentioned above and pursue legal action to defend the kids' rights for a healthy and significant relationship with their father. It's a totally different perspective and should facilitate a shift of power back to you...going on the offensive to fight for the kids, rather than being on the defensive about yourself, about whom no one in the divorce industrial complex cares. Except us, and if you have a good lawyer.

[Fatheroffour]

[w2be]

I want to thank you for being here. I have begun the documentation process and yes I am in agreement about it not being about me anymore and it being about my child. There are always more involved it seems than should be when interference is being run. Of course because Im in one state and my child is in another does not help matters. I have been bitten by the " I shouldn't have filed in the state of Mississippi bug'". I wish I had known more before I got dragged into more than a couple year custody fight . My despair began when I had a mountain of evidence of drug addiction and frivolous money spending against a mother no one wanted to listen to. It is a shame it was more important to drag my child into a situation she is now rather than hear testimony against the actions of my daughters mother at the time all of this occurred. I was appalled to hear straight from my own lawyers mouth "thats the way its done here in MS."...I fired him of course...it gave me a bad taste in my mouth to hire anyone from that state. Its been a hard search for anyone to trust in that area ....thank you so much for responding....I concentrate on doing the right things, so right things happen...i know my daughter loves me and loves being here with her daddy, I will plug away ...

[w2be]

the pic of the donut shop says it all....

[minuette]

My despair began when I had a mountain of evidence of drug addiction

The type of evidence that keeps your child out of the hands of a drug addict is evidence that is created and maintained by a disinterested party. What was your evidence? Is the mother still a drug addict?

Did you have a court order for hair follicle, blood and urine drug tests to be conducted on both of you?

Did you have documentation of hospital admissions for drug overdoses?

Did you have documentation of CPS findings that indicate that the mother was neglecting or a danger to the child?

Did you have criminal records of convictions for possession of drugs or driving while under the influence?

Did you request that the court order a full custody evaluation, including psychological evaluations and substance abuse assessments?