Living with girlfriend 1 year AFTER divorce was finalized.

[NH2013]

I have 2 children and my girlfriend as 2 children. Are there any concerns that we should have with our ex-spouses knowing that we're living together and not legally married?
We believe that the union of our two households 9even though not married) will not only benefit both of us economically, but more importantly for the children, since they get along so well and it's a much better placed to reside. We do plan on getting married within the next year, but wanted to know if anyone knew if there are legal concerns that we should be aware of prior. We reside in Concord New Hampshire. Cheers. Steve

[BubbaGumpShrimp]

From a legal standpoint...no. However, my concern would be the ex finding out that you've decreased your monthly expenses (as you mentioned) and going after you for additional child or spousal support (if you're paying your ex either of those).

Just curious...your divorce has only been finalized for a year and you're already looking to tie the knot within one more year...what's the rush?

[defaultuser]

will not only benefit both of us economically, but more importantly for the children, since they get along so well and it's a much better placed to reside.

That and getting laid on a regular basis...

Before you make the move, think about how your kids will take the breakup if it happens.

As far as the X is concerned, the typical reaction is to cause you as many problems over it as possible. I recommend radio silence. Its not that your X won't find out, she will. But refuse to help her out by discussing it with her. Its none of her business.

I seriously doubt she will have any legal leg to stand on unless your GF has some criminal past or you don't have room for everyone.

[BubbaGumpShrimp]

will not only benefit both of us economically, but more importantly for the children, since they get along so well and it's a much better placed to reside.

That and getting laid on a regular basis...

Before you make the move, think about how your kids will take the breakup if it happens.

Yup. I have to say that as a result of my first and last time that I allowed the "financial benefits" to influence me (moving NJ and her kids in)...I won't again let that be a significant factor in deciding the next time I consider cohabitation. Seriously...if that and getting laid more often are your drivers...that can end up being a big ******* mistake.

[minuette]

Before you make the move, think about how your kids will take the breakup if it happens.

+1,000

I have a friend who is going through this. He and his lady love (and I like her a lot, she's a peach) moved in together...then found that their joint household was making them both unhappy. He signed a multi-year lease on a house that he wants to be out of before the first year is up, and she might not want to stay there, either. So, they are looking at possibly breaking the lease, plus establishing new households. The only bright side to the whole deal is that their relationship is going to survive the division of households.

That said, you and your girlfriend would be wise to have some very extensive and thorough conversations, just the two of you and all six of you, about how you run your separate households and how the joint household will operate. Also, if you are finding a new residence, find one that either one of you can afford ALONE - even if that means doubling up kids in a bedroom, rather than finding a place that will allow each kid to have a separate bedroom. And if you find a new place that allows YOU to build/furnish a man cave, all the better. (Men need a man cave, it's a biological fact.)