Need a detailed assessment of the following please ...

[DavidGS]

Okay, I need a detailed reading and interpretation of the following ... I thought I had this settled, but this morning I got an email from the Parenting Coordinator stating:

I have carefully reviewed the order, and I think the weekend of August 6-7 is part of the summer. The weekend schedule is addressed in the order under the WCPS calendar and also has the 30 day notice which is NOT in the summer schedule. School does not resume until 25 August. It is a late start because of the changing school calendar.

Now, under the 'Summer' section, it clearly states what my time will be:

2. Plaintiff summer custodial period with the children shall be as follows:

A. Plaintiff shall pick up both boys on June 12 of each year and shall return them no later than 5:00 p.m. on July 31 of each year.

B. Defendant shall provide Plaintiff with a written update on May 1 and June 1 of each year. This update shall apprise Defendant of the medical, educational and emotional status of each child and note any changes since Plaintiff's previous custodial period with the boys. If there are no changes, the update shall so state. These updates must include the name and telephone number of all professionals treating the children. If there are no changes with regard to these professionals since the updates provided the previous summer, the update shall so state and thus Defendant shall not be required to again list professionals already known to Plaintiff.

C. Plaintiff may arrive in XXXXX on June 9 or June 10 and may pick up the boys on June 9 and/or June 10 between the hours of 10:00 a.m. and 6:00 p.m. Both boys will be with Defendant on June 11, as it is her birthday. Neither child may miss school or any health or therapy related appointments on June 9 or June 10. Defendant shall not schedule any health or therapy related appointment for either child on June 9 or June 10 that could be scheduled on another date or without prior notice to Plaintiff. The parent having physical custody of the children at the time of scheduled appointments shall be responsible for taking the child to the appointment.

But it does NOT say that my time is LIMITED to that only. Only that I will pick them up on June 12 and return them July 31. Nowhere does it say that I cannot have more time at a later date during the summer.

Further, the 'other custodial time' section states:

3. Plaintiff's other custodial periods with the children shall be as follows:

A. Assuming that XXXX County Public Schools continue to schedule teacher workdays and short holidays such that there is at least one (and often more than one) three (3) day weekend per month, Plaintiff shall have one (1) weekend per month to coincide with a long weekend. Plaintiff shall visit the XXX County Public School website in the spring of each year after the school calendar for the following academic year is approved, to determine which weekends constitute "long" weekends. Defendant shall do the same. These weekends shall be assumed to be Plaintiff's weekends; however, Plaintiff shall notify Defendant at least thirty (30) days in advance by e-mail of his intention to take custody of the boys. It shall be understood that many of these teacher workdays and holidays are also designated make-up days for weather-related cancellations, such as for hurricanes or snow. The boys may not miss school on these days so that these weekends could conceivably be shortened. Plaintiff may verify whether these days are actually being used as make-up days by visiting the XXXX County Public School website. If any of these weekends are scheduled for Cub Scout campouts, when Plaintiff has the boys, Plaintiff shall attend the campout with XXXX and may take YYYY if other family members are allowed.

B. The parties shall continue to alternate and/or divide the Christmas, Thanksgiving and extended spring holiday from school as set forth in subparagraphs (C), (D) and (E) of Paragraph 2 of the decretal portion of the Consent Order for Child Custody and Child Support entered in this matter on April 29, 2002.

So, as I read it, there is nothing in that section that says I have to wait until school actually starts to see my boys again.

It may sound like I'm splitting hairs here, but ... my youngest son's birthday is August 6. I have not gotten to spend his birthday with him since 2000. Also, my ex has been *very* uncooperative (asked the Parenting Coordinator "what do you mean by 'cooperation?'"), and has tried to interpret the agreement in the strictest possible sense to avoid doing *anything* that is not *specifically* required in black and white. So, I want the same standard applied to her in this regard.

Am I off-base here?

Thanks!

[CustodyIQ]

Whew!

Okay, I read every word carefully.

It is clear that outside of your June 12 to July 31 time, your only other custodial time (excluding holidays) is during the "long weekends" that are scheduled on the school calendar.

Here's the language that covers it:

"Plaintiff shall visit the XXX County Public School website in the spring of each year after the school calendar for the following academic year is approved, to determine which weekends constitute "long" weekends. Defendant shall do the same. These weekends shall be assumed to be Plaintiff's weekends;"

So, if your school's website lists August 6-7 as coinciding with a teacher workday or short holiday, you have an "assumption" that it is your weekend.

If the school calendar does not show it to be your weekend, I think you're out of luck, since that's the only other way that you get to see the boys, besides summer and holidays.

Yes, I know that it's during summer break from school, and it may not be shown on the calendar. But, that web-posted calendar is what you and mom are required to follow.

And, I think you're incorrect that you CAN'T have more during the summer (after July 31 and prior to the first long weekend). See the line that says, "Plaintiff's other custodial time is as follows:"

That's the line that screws you. If it's not under "here's dad's other time", then it's not yours.

All of that said, don't worry about your son's actual b-day. As I've learned (because my ex has daughter during X-mas every year), it's can be more fun to celebrate first with all the kid's initial excitement, rather than it being on the actual day. So... my daughter always celebrates X-mas in my home on the weekend before Christmas. She experiences all the magic and tradition of the holiday in my home, and then it's all a do-over with her mom.

You're fortunate that your vacation ends only a week prior to son's birthday... close enough to throw him a little party every year!