Beginning stages

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Re: Beginning stages

Postby mar2012 » Sat Aug 11, 2012 11:35 am

Thanks...
Last edited by mar2012 on Tue Aug 14, 2012 10:57 am, edited 2 times in total.
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Re: Beginning stages

Postby a dad » Sat Aug 11, 2012 2:06 pm

She is planning to setup residence of your kids in another state.

Not only is this your only opportunity to file for return of your children before she sets status quo, but if you wait for her to setup residence, your divorce and kids may be in another state. Act now.

In your favor - when you file for divorce in your state on Monday (along with exclusive use of home AND return of children to home), by default she will be obligated to keep the children in your state, therefore away from OM's house. The other two filings should get the kids back home and her not allowed in the home.

Enroll your kid in school in your district to show residence is at your house, in your state. For serving papers, let your attorney/server know they're in the other state and any places she may go, like her relatives - if you know her attorney's name, that will get her the papers.
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Re: Beginning stages

Postby hoosier_dad » Sat Aug 11, 2012 7:35 pm

I'd be surprised if she actually talked to an attorney. Although her actions are legal, she is doing everything possible to hand you an emergency custody order and exclusive possession of the marital home IF you act immediately. If the new attorney isn't willing to file an emergency custody motion immediately then you need to keep shopping for an aggressive attorney who will act. Also consider a PI to track her down for service.
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Re: Beginning stages

Postby mar2012 » Sat Aug 11, 2012 8:08 pm

Thanks...
Last edited by mar2012 on Tue Aug 14, 2012 10:58 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Beginning stages

Postby CCR » Sun Aug 12, 2012 12:43 am

BubbaGumpShrimp wrote:
mar2012 wrote:Yep, called the lawyer, I'm dropping off the cash Monday, (cant see him until then) to get it all started. Right when I got off the phone I felt pretty wierd...almost sick to my stomach, starting breaking out in a sweat, a lot of emotions hit me at once, mostly worry. I'm not hurt or bitter, just scared, I really really dont like courts/the system/lawyers/judges/bailiffs/the pictures of old dead judges on the walls/the smell/the other nosy people staring, the carpet on the floor & the benches. My Dad said I should wait until cooler heads previal, she might not do nothing for a while, hang on to your money, the sooner you get it done the sooner you will start paying support. Then I talked to some people who have recently been through this, & the input here, it was pretty much unanimous...start filling immediately.


The problem is that your Dad doesn't REALLY understand that you're dealing with an irrational/modern woman. I'm four months into my separation/divorce and my Dad (62) STILL doesn't REALLY get it.

My Dad has said all along..."when she sees that you're not coming back...she'll pack her stuff and get out of your house." :roll: Seriously...why the **** would a NJ do that? She's had a free roof over her head and she's free to come and go as she pleases.

Someone that's 60+ is from the generation where a woman cooked, cleaned, took care of the kids, etc. Today's generation of women want the man to be the primary wage earner AND do all of the things mentioned above. All modern women want to do is dump their kids on someone else, spend their mans money, and have no responsibility around the house. Someone that's 60+ just can't wrap their head around the modern entitled female mentality.


I couldn't have said it better. When I divorced, my parents were 72 and 67...they thought my ex was some 1 of kind lunitic.....when she was simply the common, modern woman.
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Re: Beginning stages

Postby mar2012 » Sun Aug 12, 2012 11:30 am

Thanks
Last edited by mar2012 on Tue Aug 14, 2012 10:58 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Beginning stages

Postby BubbaGumpShrimp » Sun Aug 12, 2012 11:41 am

mar2012 wrote:Talking to my Dad this morning giving him the latest, he say's it soungs like I want my cake & eat it too. He's say if I bring my son back home & dont take him back then I'm kidnapping him. He say's then I might as well go get her, bring her back home & work it out. I told him I would rather cut my right arm off than do that, I explained to him that I never want to get back with her,(he more than anyone should know this, seeing what I have been through with her) & this devorce is going to happen one way or the other. I told him that if I dont act now the STBX will have our son enrolled in school in Maryland & I'll be lucky to be able to see him EOW. He kinda shocked me.

Still thinking of a plan to get the address where she is staying, being as she is allreay fearfull of me taking him for a weekend & not bring him back, I doubt she will just give me the address if I ask. Legally speeking, does she have to disclose her current address to me? or my lawyer? I dont want her to know that I'm about to file just yet though.

I could ask my oldest, who is still living in the house to ask her for the addy because he wants to send his little Brother something in the mail. But I'm sure he knew where she was all along & didnt tell me, so I dont know where he stands on this thing.

Thanks


Don't blame him. He just doesn't get it. It's entirely likely that he never will.

Talk to your lawyer. As she's flown the coop, see if she can be served at a direct family members home (as that's your only option...if you don't come up with the address).

Your 27 year old is still living in your house? Tell him that at this point, you're accepting oaths of fealty. I'm kidding on that one...you can't expect him to pick a favorite parent...but if he won't even give you her address :roll: ...tell him that he can: 1. Get his own place or 2. Move in with Mom and her boy toy.

Another thing you might want to consider though...if BOTH your Dad and your adult son aren't on board...you should consider stepping back and re-evaluating your position.
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Re: Beginning stages

Postby mar2012 » Sun Aug 12, 2012 1:44 pm

Thanks...
Last edited by mar2012 on Tue Aug 14, 2012 10:59 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Beginning stages

Postby mar2012 » Sun Aug 12, 2012 6:35 pm

I've narrowed down the location searching ????.
Last edited by mar2012 on Tue Aug 14, 2012 8:38 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Beginning stages

Postby a dad » Sun Aug 12, 2012 6:45 pm

You got it.
Last edited by a dad on Tue Aug 14, 2012 9:22 am, edited 1 time in total.
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