probably a stupid questions but...

[Here_We_Go]

got temp orders yesterday and S4 has a b-day party during my time. question is: Am I supposed to tell nj about it and give her the opportunity to attend? Texas

[RC211V]

If you want to... not a matter of 'supposed' to, I don't think. I never heard of any order that addresses kids' social events.

My kids' mom never tells me about that stuff, I don't really tell her either. That's another big reason I feel like it's important to get to know the other parents and teachers in the kids' classes - so I know what's going on for all that stuff, without having to ask kids' mom.

Early in our separation I remember a birthday party for the kid's friend I found out about and told her I was going. She got mad and told me I couldn't go, we weren't together anymore. I said of course we aren't together but what does that have to do with either of us going to a party? She gossiped with all the airhead moms and I hung out with my kids and the family hosting the party. I was the one who ended up staying after, helping to clean up and joining the after-barbeque and watching the boxing match that night. Still good friends with their family, kids hang out. It was fun.

[Trevor]

I am not aware of any social convention in the US where party invitees are given the liberty to invite other people to the event. That's the privilege of the hosts, don't you think? [Rhet.]

[Here_We_Go]

thanks i will just take s4 and not notify. could be uncomfortable anyway so it is prob better

[FORmyBOY]

Keep it separate. Your not, or won't, be married anymore so quit worrying about her. You want to go to go to joint parties for the rest of your life??
Very few things are worthy of invite to child's mom.... Baptism, first communion, school graduation... Basically one time events.

[Chosen2Dad]

You could if you want to be nice...but it's not worth it. I am learning as we speak. And I can't wait to completely not share anything with her!

[TransAm]

Don't do it. Your occasions are now YOUR occasions. She will now have to provide a second birthday party.

Likewise, maybe next year you won't see your kid on your birthday or on theirs.

I have my turkey for Thanksgiving either 2 weeks before, after, or on Thanksgiving, depending on when I have the kids.

Pretend you're living 4 hours away. Seperate your lives.