I need to switch attorneys

Advice on divorce for men considering or starting the divorce process. Get marriage separation advice for men in this divorce forum and child custody forum.

I need to switch attorneys

Postby Ilovemyboys » Fri Jun 01, 2012 6:03 am

After reading on here yesterday, I decided to be more assertive in my rights. I am a little frustrated I wasn't advised to do so earlier.

My attorney yesterday finally said he can't negotiate for me if I keep changing my mind. But his definition of negotiating is "I will advise my client to pay child support, mortgage, daycare, insurance for the next four months, or until custody and child support can be heard." "He'll accept every other weekend and dinner on Wednesday evenings." He's not negotiating, he's passing on the requests of the Plaintiff's counsel. He's basically thrown up his hands and said, "Come to court Tuesday and let's hope you get heard."

I supposedly have a temporary Divorce from Bed and Board, Custody, Support and Attorney Fees hearing Tuesday, but the case load for court is such that they feel it won't be heard.

Two days before court and I feel I am not being represented.

What do I do now?

STBX has a very assertive/aggressive attorney. She's known for bypassing collaboration, mediation and going straight to court. This has been her strategy so far. Not only is she after me, but she filed an Alienation complaint to an alleged paramour on the same day she filed my complaint. Everyone advises against an Alienation complaint, they sound good, but no one wins but the attorneys.

I understand I may have compromised my situation by moving out. I was following the advise of two attorneys. Locks have been changed and I have already been notified that if I go on the premise without explicit written permission then it is domestic trespass.

I understand I have equal access to my children without temporary orders, or agreements. Me and my STBX have nothing written at all. I have been giving into her wishes from the get go. I asked my attorney what would happen if I picked up my kids from school and took them to the park and dinner. He said they would file an Emergency Custody Order. What Why and How?

Sorry - I am a newbie. And I am crunched for time. I did a lot of research last night on new lawyers, but no one can see me until after the hearing.

Any positive advice is appreciated.
Ilovemyboys
10+ Posts
 
Posts: 23
Joined: Wed May 02, 2012 5:29 pm

Re: I need to switch attorneys

Postby Fatheroffour » Fri Jun 01, 2012 6:57 am

You are in a very tough spot and it's a shame you were given such bad advice by not one but two separate attorneys. Not surprising, but a shame.

Yes, they will file an emergency order if you pick up the kids and keep them. That works two ways. One possible strategy for you to attempt to 'catch up' is that you pick up the kids and keep them and you file for an emergency temporary order in which you request a 50/50 split parenting time.

To me, this says to the court that you are not willing to sit by and accept the current minimums you have and that you want to be more involved (like you were before you relied on bad legal advice). The longer the current situation goes on the harder it will be to change.
Divorce is in the air. What should I do?
What not to do

List of Acronyms
The List
About The List

Everyone lies.
User avatar
Fatheroffour
Moderator
 
Posts: 19776
Joined: Fri Oct 12, 2007 8:37 am
Location: Top of the world

Re: I need to switch attorneys

Postby MyBeautifulDaughter » Fri Jun 01, 2012 7:01 am

I'm new to this too but I would've fired my lawyer already if I didn't feel they were looking out for my best interests. Your lawyer's job is to achieve the best possible results for you that he/she can out of this dire situation you have found yourself in. I'm a research monster. Before I made initial contact with my lawyer I knew everything I could about him from where he likes to play golf to his win/ loose ratio in court to how his relationship is to each of the judges in my area.
Dump that lawyer ASAFP and find a new one. I read about one guy on here that had to use three different attorneys till he found one that would work for him.
Don't feel bad about this either. If I felt I had to, I would drop my lawyer so fast he wouldn't be able to remember my name. Nearly your entire future rest in the hands of your attorney (custody, financial, where you can live, etc.) make sure they are clear as to what you want and if they cannot even fight for you move on.
My daughter is my source of strength. I will never give up on her like her mother has our family.
MyBeautifulDaughter
10+ Posts
 
Posts: 37
Joined: Wed May 23, 2012 11:14 am

Re: I need to switch attorneys

Postby Fatheroffour » Fri Jun 01, 2012 7:05 am

to his win/ loose ratio in court


Could you please share with the board how you were able to determine this. It would be a gold mine of data for other dads.

Also, please describe what determines whether a particular case is a win or a loss since family court is a bit different than a prosecuting DA's conviction percentage.
Divorce is in the air. What should I do?
What not to do

List of Acronyms
The List
About The List

Everyone lies.
User avatar
Fatheroffour
Moderator
 
Posts: 19776
Joined: Fri Oct 12, 2007 8:37 am
Location: Top of the world

Re: I need to switch attorneys

Postby MyBeautifulDaughter » Fri Jun 01, 2012 7:27 am

How did I determine a win/loose ratio and what constitutes a win? First I gathered all information I could about him from the internet. I then started asking around to other people what they thought of him. But not just people that have hired him also people that have been up against him.
What constitutes a win, is really up to you. Everything that I've seen and heard about my lawyer tells me that he wins or achieves what I would consider a win.
My daughter is my source of strength. I will never give up on her like her mother has our family.
MyBeautifulDaughter
10+ Posts
 
Posts: 37
Joined: Wed May 23, 2012 11:14 am

Re: I need to switch attorneys

Postby Fatheroffour » Fri Jun 01, 2012 7:53 am

Oh.

OK.

Not what I thought.
Divorce is in the air. What should I do?
What not to do

List of Acronyms
The List
About The List

Everyone lies.
User avatar
Fatheroffour
Moderator
 
Posts: 19776
Joined: Fri Oct 12, 2007 8:37 am
Location: Top of the world

Re: I need to switch attorneys

Postby kmich91262 » Fri Jun 01, 2012 9:19 am

May I suggest the following reading: viewtopic.php?f=4&t=45561
kmich91262
1K+ Posts
 
Posts: 1320
Joined: Thu Dec 04, 2008 3:38 pm
Location: 50/50

Re: I need to switch attorneys

Postby Ilovemyboys » Fri Jun 01, 2012 10:01 am

Thanks. I read that exact thread this morning. Sounds a lot like what I have too.

I have an interview with one this afternoon. I like what his website says, so we'll see what he says this afternoon.

I appreciate you guys and this forum.

I will also investigate the emergency order for 50/50 custody.
Ilovemyboys
10+ Posts
 
Posts: 23
Joined: Wed May 02, 2012 5:29 pm


Return to Before and During Divorce Forum

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 6 guests