Does this constitute domestic violence, if so, what now?

[capslock]

I'm with the document it crowd.

[Thoughts?]

She hit you with a fridge door in a moment of anger.

Personally, I threw a paper back book in the general direction of my ex and she used that as a cause for a TRO. She was shopping for a reason. There was no possibility of physical injury, and she had provoked the argument.

So what is your goal? Why are you on a dadsdivorce site shopping for input on this being DV?

You and your wife have deeper issues, and turning a fridge incident into a cause for a DV complaint or restraining order, particularly if there is no pattern or history, is only addressing the symptoms.

[BubbaGumpShrimp]

Yes, it will...she is testing her boundaries...

Yup. You can bet on it. If she hit you with a fridge door just because she was a little angry...imagine how well it's going to go over when you tell her that you're leaving (when you finally decide to). There's a reason why many people call LEO's for move out day.

[malcontent]

Wow, bunch of replies since I last checked! Been crazy busy over here so I haven't had time to get on the forums in a while.

There haven't been any more 'violient' outburts, but she seems to get angrier and angrier as the days go on.

Today she decided to play 20 questions before I left for work about WHY I leave for work (I own my own business and can/do work from home often, but a few days a week I need out of the house as it's impossible to concentrate with a baby and wife at home) which left her seething.

I told her the same thing I do every time she asks why I need to work out of the house, I can't concentrate here and I get much more work done when I'm not home.

Then, while working (I usually get about 3 hours of work done a day, any more and she'll be freaking) I get a phone call from her completely pissed off because the bug guy came today when they were supposed to show up a week ago, yet somehow it's my fault.

Also, she seems to be starting arguments on purpose to get me to react, I think. Every day (and I do mean EVERY day) she ends up with, "Why did you say X when it was actually Y" when I had told her Y in the first place.

Today it was about a doctor appointment for our son. His Dr. called yesterday and said he had room for us on Thursday, which I told her, and somewhere along the lines (even after we had a lengthy conversation about it yesterday) she thought I told her Wednesday. And things like this end up being huge mountains all the time.

Every time she starts something I get closer and closer to just telling her I want a divorce, but I'm nowhere near ready financially or otherwise.

And to make matters worse, while I want the freedom of letting her have full custody, I don't want to be a deadbeat dad who's just never there.

There's all sorts of things I want to get out and do, but I also want to be there for my son. Dilemma's... I may start another thread on that topic actually...

But that's where I am right now.

I need to go back and read the list again and really start preparing. I'm not sure how much longer I can take it all.

[RC211V]

Yeah read the list. First you need to make a decision.

If you want to be a parent and not give her full custody (bummer dude), the only advice you really need to follow right now is

-- --- Don't talk to your wife --- --

If you want to be free from parenthood, get the fack out of the house and start bangin some hoes.

[TejasDad]

I hope the OP means joint custody and not full custody. If it IS full custody that you wish her to have, then hit her with the freezer door and that should just about do it.

[Bubba Seal]

To the Op, Im not familiar with your story, but have the two of you tryed any sort of counceling? All I get from what you have said is that the two of you dont know how to communicate.