Delayed 50/50. Thoughts?

[AlmostSane]

Just had another chat with STBX.

I insisted on 50/50 from the start.

Right now we are in tentative agreement on this schedule:

H: Mon, Tue, Wed
W: Thu, Fri, Sat

And then we alternate Sunday. I think it comes out to 4-4-3-3.

I don't like the switch on Sunday morning, as I preferred to do the switch at school, but W works M-W.

1) What do you think of this schedule? Initially I suggested 2-2-3, since we have a 2 year old, but W countered with the above schedule.

2) For the Sunday transfer, and for any transfers that do not take place at the school. Is it better for the receiving parent to pick up the kids? Or for the other parent to drop off the kids?

[jumbledone]

I don''t trust STBX to get the kids to me on time. I plan on picking them up whenever there is a possessory time change that is not handled by school days.

[hoosier_dad]

Never having a full weekend with the children to plan activities would really suck, as would never having a free weekend.

[AlmostSane]

Never having a full weekend with the children to plan activities would really suck, as would never having a free weekend.

Yes, this is an issue. I have to talk to her again tonight about this.

Now she wants to add a clause that if the kids are sick, they stay with her. With make up time for me.

I already told her no to this. But I am curious, has anybody seen a clause like this in a parenting plan?

What about visiting the kids, when they are sick?

[Fatheroffour]

Caring for a sick child is one of the duties and privleges of a parent. I would be highly insulted that she would want to take that from you.

UNLESS>>>>>


How about you get them when they're healthy and she gets them when they're sick?


Unless a doctor is going on record that the child should be confined to bed there is no reason why the normal parenting schedule should be interrupted by a run of the mill illness.

[hoosier_dad]

Now she wants to add a clause that if the kids are sick, they stay with her. With make up time for me.

I already told her no to this. But I am curious, has anybody seen a clause like this in a parenting plan?

Never had that in my decree, but my ex assumed that would be the case when they got sick on my parenting time during a work day. Actually demanded make up time for missing out on their sick time on my parenting time.

It's a tremendous privilege to be able to stay home and care for a sick child, and amazing that an ex can't see the absurdity in waking up a sick child and transporting them to another house. Not to mention the signal you'd be sending a judge in a future custody mod, that you can't even care for a sick child.

This is a small part of a larger control issue that you'll need to break her of, but push off these convos as much as possible until after you reach your custody agreement.