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Alright guys, just completed my hearing for stbx requesting mod to temp orders I am crushed in a fog and have no idea where to proceed. I was served on Friday for today's hearing. The mod was for "safety and well being" of child. Thus, my intention this am was to appear and request continuence to obtain representation. Primarily on the grounds that during a cordial discussion on Monday with STBX, she matter of factly stated that she had not seen petition, or made this accusation and went on to say it was simply to obtain more time with him. (under current orders he has been with me on average of 20 days each month, not including days she volunteered to give up and/or ended early. All documented....I have specific examples of items that I was concerned with his safety, getting him involved in activities Under temp orders, we were given house sharing that ended when SHE proposed that she stay at friends house(mr wonderful) and on her days with him stayed at another friends home that have be vacated. I can go on and on with lack of involvement(verifiable)...
On 3 different occasions, is specifically mentioned that I would like a continuence, not including the Pro Se check in sheet. The request was never approved or denied, but she did address her admission of never making accusation by saying "she probably did not feel like discussing issue with you". WTF? I did not ask for it, she put it out there? Apparently, the nail in the coffin, was a photo of litter(not beer liquor drugs, etc). An additional photo of blood spatter was also introduced. This photo was taken after she rushed home to check on dog who severely injured himself and I was here "cleaning" others spots, 10 feet away!. I advised her of that and once again said that is why I would like to request continuence.....no response. It appeared that every time I began to speak, she was preoccupied writing on the decision form? I left there homeless April 12th and standard parenting time.(my financial remains as it was at the time of original orders and parenting time reduced from 50/50....most of which she chose not to utilize).
I am devastated, that kid is my life. I've heard to horrific stories in court, but wow! I've scheduled a consult with an atty tomorrow. Not sure it makes a difference, but with changes of this magnitude, I should be allowed to present my evidence it the appropriate manner. Thoughts?
The hearing was not continued because it concerned immediate safety of the child. How was your stbx able to collect photos of your home after she moved out????? Either that's her mess or you screwed up by allowing her into your home. Instead of scheduling one consult, schedule several. No more casual conversations with the ex. Texas counts overnights in calculating parenting time, not days or hours in the day. (in case you didn't know)
Allow me to clarify....I wanted continuation, due to the allegations in the petition of which she never read or or implied. She went on to say "it is not about who is a good parent and who is not. I simply want more time with him". Although I asked 3 separate times and entered on my check-in sheet(instructed by balif), it was never formally denied or approved, the judge simply shrugged of the verifiable errors.
Early on I was admonished by the court, when I changed the locks and advised by previous atty that I should chg back. This was before temp orders. We entered into house share. As for the photos, one of them was from her rushing home to check on dog. Both myself and son were utilizing house that day and picture was taken, while I was maybe 10 ft away cleaning up the blood near the doorway.
Definitely no more casual conversations, but also have tons of texts from her in response to my concerns of injuries(2 black eyes) and was very polite, but her responses were < edited >.
Lastly, she has had a history of narcotics abuse and theft from work, 3 times at previous employer and terminated. She has had 2 at current job and entered substance abuse classes in Feb. She is currently on a 1 year restriction at work(not able to give meds or work unsupervised. Her excuse to this was that "someone had it out for her and set her up".
The accepted this excuse and simply advised me that she will order drug test and that should be sufficient for you.
Petition was filed by stbx to modify temporary orders, alleging "concern for him and refusing to care for him in suitable manner.
Since he has been with me an average of 23 days each month, I sent her a text "did you arrange care with your sister, so that I can attend my "deadbeat dad" hearing on Wednesday? She responded, "deadbeat dad hearing?". Why would you say that? I simple replied, have you not seen the serious allegation in the petition? She replied "no"? I asked so you've not seen anything stating "concern for him and refusing to care for him in suitable manner?. She said, "No, I've never seen it". She then says "no one is accusing you of anything". I replied, "you may want to read what I was served". She replies " I don't think you understand what it is about. It's not whether either of us is a good parent or not, I just need more time with him"
With that and all of my journal entries in tow, I set out for the hearing this a.m. to request a continuence due to the severity of her request and what appear to be documented falsehoods on the position. I asked for it on 3 seperate occasions and the judge addressed the text conversation (listed above) by saying, "maybe she did not want to discuss".
Her atty began to speak and stopped at which time, i advised that my intentions today was to get continuence for representation. She nodded her head and continued listening to opposing counsel. I offered evidence to support my request(text and journal entries). She never accepted any of them. The next thing I knew, the attorney presented photos of blood spatter on the floor of kitchen to support the their welfare concern. The judged was taken by surprise and said " this certainly not good". At which time, I advised her that the photo was taken while I was approximately 10 feet away cleaning another area. I stressed that at no time we were living in that manner, it had just happened. The next thing I knew was I was to be out of the house by the 12th and had gone from 50/50 to standard < parenting time >. The only material evidence presented was the photo, the rest was verbal on their part. Although, I offered my documentation, it was never considered.
No the dog did not bite anyone, he injured himself and was the source of the blood spatter.
Her filing a bunch of nonsense and later saying that's not what she meant or that's not what she said and deflecting it to make the attorney look like the bad guy is a common occurrence. It happened many times to me as well.
He filing says I screamed at her. I haven't screamed since I fell out of the hay loft at 8 years old and split my head open. I confront her about it and she says "That's just what the my attorney wrote."
Later in court when that's brought up the answer is "I just didn't want to argue about it." which even in my mind is a legitimate and believable answer. I've yeah, yeahed many people myself.
I'm curious if you noticed any procedural differences between when you offered your text and journal entries that apparently were not entered into evidence and when he offered the photo into evidence?
Just for the sake of clarity....... 1) the dog hurt itself. 2) She found out and rushed home. 3) She found you tending the dog so she grabs a camera and starts snapping pictures. 4) She later uses the picture as evidence of your poor parenting
Thx caps lock! And yes you have the dog correct. As for procedural changes, heck if I know that why I wanted representation. As for my impression a resounding "yes". It was very apparent that opposing atty and judge knew each other well. And, honestly I don't she gave a darn about anything I had to say or offer. My (documented) explanations to in response to stbx's (Verbal) allegations carried absolutely no weight. The only material evidence they entered were the photos I will outline 2 concerns that I raised, both of which were met with the the most bs excuses that I've heard. And yes, both were accepted as fact by the judge.
1. Stbx has a history of substance abuse and has now racked up a total of 5 instances where she was found to be stealing narcotics. 3 times at her last job and was terminated for it. She has 2 instances at current employer and was suspended from work and ordered to attend treatment.(she just completed it in February and is on probation for one year at work!)
Stbx's excuse to judge...."a lady had it out for me and set me up".
2. My son told me that while with her, he manged to get out of the house, cross the street and went to a pond by himself.( obviously, I talked with him about the dangers) when I asked stbx about it she said "that's true". This was also documented via text......
Stbx's excuse to judge....."they had placed a fence around the pond because someone DROWNED, so he did not make it past the perimeter fence."
I couldn't make this stuff up if I tried. This is what I dealt with today.