Hi and welcome to DadsDivorce, the leader in divorce help for men, fathers rights and mens rights. We provide divorced dads with concrete, practical divorce resources to achieve the best results in the courtroom.
Not sure. I dont think I could ever me happy not seeing my kids everyday for the rest of my life. Im happy they are safe and healthy and emotional strong, happy I am primary and see them the majority of time, happy their mom is sober, happy that as an involved Dad I will forever be a driving positive force in their lives. But knowing there will be nights they wake up crying, or are sick throwing up and ill never be there when they call out for me will break my heart for a long, long time.
I guess Im more relieved this mess is over (although the financial mess will be around for years to come) BUT, from a personal standpoint knowing that I can rebuild and start new is the biggest victory.
I told my Dad last night that this almost 5 year process felt like I was up in a plane all alone. Forever circling in a holding pattern while the world went on without me. Now I can hear the landing gear open up as I approach the runway....
He didn't tell me how to live; he lived, and let me watch him do it. ~Clarence Budington Kelland
Where'd you get the idea that even happily married parents get to see their kids every day for the rest of their lives? Did you somehow skip high school as a kid? [Rhet.]
The kid'll be fine when they wake up unwell and either parent is there for them. Of course you'd rather it would be you, but you need to be realistic about the fact that kids need time with both parents and that they'd be with mom some of the time.
Stop using hyperbole with yourself and keep being a great Dad. I ended up with EOW but I see my now-adult kids all the time and they cherish the time together, as do I. Don't beat yourself up, the divorce is final!
I don't know if my perspective is completely analogous, or if anybody else would agree with me, but I kinda feel like I had to let my kids grow up sooner than some parents. I'm their dad wherever we are, and they can contact me any time, but I'm not in close proximity quite as much as some parents (although I am in proximity a lot more than some parents who aren't divorced). But it's sort of like when your kid goes to college maybe, or starts fulltime school, or maybe when they move away for whatever. It just happened a little earlier than I figured it would. But our relationship is still real and makes me happy, and I feel like they are happy too.